Thursday, October 27, 2011

For the Patron Saint's Name of Frick

Long ago in my past there was a girl.

This girl was madly in love with me, and I say that not because I'm trying to brag, but because it's true. She was in love with me.

However, she could not reconcile her Christian beliefs with what I viewed to be a wonderful life.

My "wonderful life" I made quite clear was my future wife and I sitting on a beach, her in a french maid outfit, serving me a martini sans children gallivanting around Europe in a convertible eating at the finest restaurants and dancing in the Italian and French Rivieras.

Of course, she contested the french maid outfit thing and said and I quote, "And your views of the perfect marriage. Me just dressing up in a sultry lingerie outfit while you sit there and drink ALCOHOL! I can't think of anything more degrading."

Naturally it didn't go anywhere and she is currently engaged to what I am reliably informed to be a pansified beta male who is a "good church going Christian."

Now, lessons aside from the importance that women start to learn and acknowledge male sexuality for what it is, if they ever do decide they really want to have a serious chance at a happy marriage, the lesson to learn here is how to use Frederick's of Hollywood to your advantage men.

In short, Fredericks of Hollywood is an OUTSTANDING way to test whether a girl is worth dating or not. Understand women who like to dress up in lingerie, dress sexy, wear whatever outfits are SUPREMELY more confident in themselves and are more stable than women who view it as some kind of torture or servitude and whine and complain about it, OR use it as a means to extract resources out of you. The woman who just wants to dress up in lingerie for her own benefit, OUTSTANDING. The woman who wants to wear sexy lingerie to make you happy, OUTSTANDING EVEN MORE! You will find those women who are "pro-lingerie" are the ones you want to date (obviously), but not just for sexual reasons, but because of mental and maturity reasons.

There is however one problem with the Frederick's of Hollywood lingerie thing. You need to actually be reasonably sexy to pull it off.

Somebody tell the patrons of Frederick's of Hollywood that:

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