Saturday, September 30, 2006

Banned Statistics on Education - Part I

No doubt once the NEA gets word of this they'll send their tippy top super secret elite assassination ninjas after me to shut me up. But, I'm not too worried because I figure those ninjas got their training in the public schools, and thus their assassination skills were honed under the tutelage of an outcome based programs. That is of course unless they value their assassination ninjas like they do their children, and do what all members of the NEA and public-school-stalwart democrats do with their children; send them to the private schools. Then I'm in trouble.

Oh well.

So here's the deal (and I'll make this short and sweet for all the busy important people, AHEM, TERRY, FOZ, MIKE, KRATOWSKI);

Since the left is ALWAYS asking for more money for education (despite record levels being spent already) I wanted to find out once and for all whether spending more money on education resulted in better educated students. So I set out to correlate spending per pupil against standardized test scores such as the SAT or the NAEP tests by state.

The results were interesting and complicated, so I decided to do three segments so as not to overhwhelm you with charts (besides I'm waiting on some data from other sources).

First comparison I did was SAT scores against spending per pupil by state. I used two measures of spending per pupil. One from the National Center for Education Statistics (NCES) and the other (as to quelch bias or criticism that the NCES is a tool of the Bush administration) the communists' favorite, the National Education Association (NEA). (I also did them in two seperate years 2001 and 2003 so as to match the exact year with the data. In other words, shut up, there's nothing wrong with the figures so just eat it and weep.)
The result is what conservatives, libertarians, capitalists and free-marketers have suspected all along, and the primary reason the NEA will dispatch their tippy top super secret elite (privately school trained, however) assassination ninjas to kill me; more money does not equal better education. Matter of fact it is worse. The correlation coefficient between the two is actually negative (-.3, -.4 if you do not take out the District of Columbia which was an outlier), showing that the more money spent on the public schools THE WORSE THEIR STUDENTS ACTUALLY DID, suggesting that there is not only incompetence in the public schools, but borderline corruption.

Now here's the problem though. Not all students take the SAT, only college-bound. The above correlations say nothing of the education the non-college bound received. Thus I wanted to see if there was a standardized test out there that all students were required to take. And here's where we run into some problems.

Frankly, there aren't any standardized tests that fully capture the total education a student receives by state. Welcome to the world of substitution data.

The closest thing I could find was the National Assessment of Educational Progress' (NAEP) tests which are issued at the 4th, 8th and 12th grades. Optimally I would have liked to use the 12th grade data as this would inlclude the entire educational career of the student, however there is no 12th grade data by state. You have to go to the 8th grade data for that. And even the 8th grade data is not complete. Some years are missing, some subjects (math, science, etc.) are missing in different years. Still, wanting to be statistically correct and just to satiate curiosity, I ran the figures with the 8th grade mathematics scores by state against per pupil spending.

The ninjas may hold off.

For oddly, while more money results in lower SAT scores, more money does help 8th grade math scores anyway. The correlation is actually a strong positive one, coming in around a +.3 (note if you include the outlier District of Columbia, the correlation drops to 0, message to DC public schools; your teachers, your parents, your students and all your schools REALLY suck)Now, obvious gaps in this measure exist. It completely ignores high school. It doesn't account for other topics like science, grammar etc., (although the NAEP has figures for these, just not in 2003 or in their entirety). But still it begs the question, why seemingly does more money benefit the average student and seemingly hurt the college-bound.

I have a theory; that the majority of money is being spent on crap programs for crap students. Programs that do not foster or promote success and achievement, but in an affirmative-action sort of way, programs that prop up the losers and celebrate mediocrity (if ever achieved). It reminds me of the Simpson's episode where Homer gets a job at Globex under Hank Scorpio. Bart is sent to a remedial 4th grade where among retarded students they play musical chairs
where there are more chairs than students. The music ends, all the kids find a seat and the teacher yells out "yea!!! You're all winners!"

I'm so happy that it seems when the public schools are asking me for more money, that in reality they're asking me to pay for kids to feel good about themselves or become average. Not to help bring about the next Bill Gates or Einstein who will make greater contributions to society (and increase my chances of seeing some of my social security).


But like I said, there are some kinks to be worked out in the data and I wouldn't be too quick to draw conclusions from it. According to the NAEP data for 12th graders will be coming in the future, alas it seems we will just have to sit and wait. But the data thus far does seem to point to more public school money = poorer college bound students. No wonder home schooling is so popular.

Next issue I address some more statistical concerns and I look at a specific state where (of course) the democrats are asking for yet MORE money for education.


To tide you over until that time, here's an interesting chart I concocted that I realized is relatively pointless, but would still be interesting;

Friday, September 29, 2006

You Will Tune Into The Economics Supper Club, Baby!

Hey baby it's cold outside. Blustery fall winds. Chill in the air.

How 'bout instead of walking the dog you and I cozy up under the blanket with some rumple minz and hot chocolate and tune into "The Economics Supper Club."

The good news is we'll get a double whammy because he's subbing for Dave Thompson TONIGHT! Friday from 730-10PM Central Standard Time.

Then we can tune into the Captain tomorrow again on Saturday, as he broadcasts from 1-3 PM Central Standard Time.

What station baby, you ask? That's AM 1500, KSTP. And if we happen to be outside the Twin Cities metro area, it's all good baby. We can listen online at www.am1500.com .

Now look baby, I'll let you call the Captain, but you gotta promise to be faithful to me. I know with his Captain Jack Sparrow rugged charms combined with this Alan Greenspan knowledge of economics makes him irresistable, heck, I question my own sexuality sometimes listening to him talk about fiscal policy, but you musn't fall for that dashing, handsome, and sexy economist/professional dancer/fossil hunter of a man. Ok?

651-646-8255
1-877-615-1500

Those digits are gold, baby.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Let Me Explain to You How This Income Distribution Thing Works

Take two charts;

One showing US Corporate profits as a percent of GDP are at an all time high;


A second showing that wages as a percent of national income has gone down seemingly at the expense of corporate profits going up;



This would be enough to send your average leftist into a hissy fit about the evils of corporations and how Bush is evil and how Haliburton is forcing children to eat squirrel carcas in the inner-city just to survive.

Of course "intellectual honesty" doesn't matter jack to the left, additionally, nothing brings them to a voracious psychological orgasm than a good outlandish conspiracy theory, and thusly instead of finding out the true cause of this deviation, they opt to feel sorry for themslves and go into their knee-jerk default "Bush is Hitler" and "Corporations are Evil" modes.

So it seems once again, we are in desperate need of another "Economics for Idiots Lesson" 102.

What is interesting and triggered my desire to make this post is in a recent and phenomonal survey by The Economist, it shows you this divergence from corporate profits and wages is not just relegated to the US. It's happening across the entire developed world.

Corporate profits are taking a larger share of ALL developed nations' incomes



And wages are taking up a smaller share of ALL developed nations' incomes.



thereby lessening the credibility of the leftists' argument that Bush is behind all this (although, no doubt some will insist Bush is FOISTING this effect on foreign nations as well - remember, sophomoric-college-age-conspiracy-theory-induced psychological orgasms are much more fun than the truth).

Thus, there must be some other force, some variable affecting this change, transferring a higher and higher proportion of national incomes to corporations and taking it away from the workers.

This is the variable that the left doesn't bother looking for, nor wants to look for, because they have what seems to be CONCLUSIVE PROOF that corporations and Bush are out there throwing old people through the jet engines of Air Force 1 and sucking out the blood of minorities at night because they're vampires (which sadly isn't too much more outlandish that some theories Kos is pushing).

However, we being of a higher-caliber and way more sexy human;

Junior,
Deputy,
Aspiring and
Everyday

Economists,

know the merits of pursuing the truth and thus look for it.

Sexy savvy as we all are, we know that one of the major forces in the past 5 years that has had an effect on every aspect from the housing market to the cost of clothes has been China and to a larger extent the developing world. But beyond clothes and housing, one area of the economy where China, India, Mexico and other developing nations have had an effect on has been the labor market. And the most prominent among their effects has been the issue of outsourcing.

Any industrial or laboring job has been outsourced to China and India and other countries where labor is a mere fraction of the bloated hourly wage of their US Union counterparts. Why fix a plane with Northwest Airlines mechanics that are paid $67,000 + benies when that plane can be flown to Thailand and fixed by Jamil for $15,000/ year and no benies? Why pay some textile union worker $25/hour in Vermont when Chang can do it for $2/hour in Xinghua? And why pay Steve in Chicago $14/hour to answer phones in a call center when Punjab will do it for $3/hour?

This is what is causing the divergence from wages and corporate profits. For no longer do corporations have to pay hefty American wages, further inflated by the greed (and stupidity) of unions, then can go to Bangalore and get the exact same service for a mere fraction of the cost resulting in not only increased profits, but lowering (or at least) stagnating wages here in the US.

Of course the question is whose theory is more likely to be true?

Captain Capitalism's theory that China and outsourcing is the cause for increased corporate profits and stagnating domestic wages;

or

Socialists' theory that George Bush is scheming with Corporate America to further impoverish the lower classes while enriching his buddies (while the entire time heaving Grandma into engine #3 fo Air Force 1.)

The irony here of course is that there is another variable that exposes the democratic party for unbelievable hypocrisy, for it isn't just the Chinese and Indians we're outsourcing our jobs to, there's also Mexico.

Whether in Mexico or not, whether legally here in the US or not, it doesn't matter. Because of the proximity to the US, Mexican labor offers the same advantages as does Chinese labor, but closer to home. Additionally they also boost corporate profits while depressing worker's wages here.

But notice how the democrats treat Chinese and Indian labor DIFFERENTLY than Mexican labor.

They'll lash out at the "outsoucing of our economy to China and India." They'll complain about unfair labor practices in foreign nations. They'll complain that corporations are going overseas.

But will you hear them complain about Mexican labor? Will you hear them take just as hard of a stance against illegal immigration as they do anti-outsourcing?

And there's the hypocrisy. For you see fellow democrat stalwarts, lower-income earning Americans, and especially you union folks, the Chinese can't vote in American elections because they'd have to cross the Pacific. But Mexicans just need to cross the Rio Grande. And once here, eh, who's to tell them they can't vote or work, because they are potential future democrat voters. And that trumps any desire to help you people out.

Now truthfully, I'm all for labor, foreign or domestic, legal or illegal, Chinese of Mexican, no matter how we come by it because there actually are some benefits to foreign labor. The left won't dare mention these benefits because it detracts from their conspiracy theories, but again we noble economists are a bit more interested in the truth.

One, the prices of goods comes down.





We'll of course blast Wal-Mart for paying market wages. We'll blast the Chinese for taking away our jobs. We'll banish Wal-Mart from Chicago. But I often wonder when the left is going to get around to thanking Wal-Mart and the Chinese for bringing down prices for everything under the sun thereby boosting the purchasing power of people, especially the poor, and thus effectively doing more for the poor than any government social program ever could (remember those drug prescriptions?)

Two, for you credit hogs that insist on just borrowing money instead of working for it, you can thank China for financing all of our deficits, keeping interest rates low and artificially boosting the price of your house so you can withdraw EVEN MORE money from the equity of your house to help you live beyond your means and pay for crap you don't need.

Of course, there is a drawback to this. What is effectively happening is that China and India are becoming the Factories of the world, while the US and its western counterparts are effectively becoming the Malls of the world. We won't produce the wealth, but boy, we sure like consuming it. Thusly, I like to further analogize;

China and India are becoming the father of the family, putting food on the table, housing over our heads etc., while;

the US and western nations are becoming the trophy wife and spoiled brat suburbanite princess with Daddy's credit card. Producing no wealth, but spending all the money.

And while this may work out on your favorite episode of Desperate Houseditzes, in the long run it is not sustainable.

The solution?

Oh, you leftists are not going to like the solution. For it gets back to what I've been saying all along;

America has got to get back to what it historically has done best; be the leader of the world in innovation and technology.

For it is not working harder or longer that makes a country great. It is working smarter. It is replacing work altogether with automated processes that frees up our time to pursue other pursuits. It's developing cell phones so we an produce GDP on the road and tractors so we can produce 100 times the food than we do by hand. It's completely overhauling the way things are done with faster and more efficient methods so that instead of being like Ethiopia and digging a ditch with our hands, we're rerouting trading systems from the comforts of our own air conditioned office and producing 900 times the wealth in the same amount of time.

And the catalyst for this creation and innovation?

Sorry lefties, it ain't the bastions of traditional employment for you guys. No philosophy degree will help bring about the US getting back its competitive edge. No sociology degree with entice Samsung to build their next semi-conductor plant here. And certainly no political science degree will ever, EVER do anything to make us a more attractive destination for foreign investors.

It's the sciences.

Engineering, physics, mathematics, chemistry, computers, biology.

Alas, it seems the developing world is going to kick our ass in that department too.



But don't worry, I think if we protest loud enough like the French for higher paying jobs and lifetime employment, we'll no doubt hold on to our position as the wealthiest nation in the world...that and Selma Hayek will date me.

Party On Wayne, Party on Garth

http://reuters.myway.com/article/20060927/2006-09-27T204956Z_01_N27232538_RTRIDST_0_NEWS-ENERGY-7-ELEVEN-GASOLINE-DC.html

Rock on Apu!

When it All Starts to Sound Like Rap - The Best of 2005

I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but rap sucks. No, it's true, really, I'm not making this up. It sucks so bad that scientists were actually able to prove that it sucks with a simple geometric theorem. Something with tangents I believe.

Now you might say, "Well, it's really a matter of opinion. There are millions of people that think rap is great," and not only you, but those millions of people would be wrong, for as I stated before, it's been proven.

But you might be surprised in my reasoning for thinking rap sucks. Most would chalk it up to me being a white male economist who could not possibly appreciate the art and relate to the listeners. Truth is I own around a score of rap CD's because I actually liked, LIKED, rap. The Beastie Boys mixed it up with a little funk, even put out some good stuff into the late 90's. Old school like Run DMC and Public Enemy were good. I'll even accept Cypress Hill in his overkilled "Insane in the Membrane"...lousy stinking cops always coming to try and snatch my crops.

But alas the days of rap artists that had not only staying power, but talent, are long gone. And I am regaled everyday with samples from the latest flash in the pan artist for I have the luxury of teaching introductory economics at a local community college.

Populated with nothing but the finest 18-20 year olds the public schools have to offer, once class ends, the little kiddies put on their baseball caps, make a break for their cars, blast up their poor quality speakers on their late 80's model GM cars in some sort of counter-productive mating ritual and burn out of the parking lot with the latest rapper singing;

"F-You and F-Dat. I F'd-Your Mom and F'd-Your Cat. F-yourself, yo' head I will cap!"

and other such favorites that I'm sure Sinatra just hadn't gotten around to composing arrangements for yet.

Yet, the lewd and crass lyrics are still not the primary reason I have fallen out of love with rap. The primary reason is that the music is has become so repetitive and unoriginal that it all starts to sound the same. The same beat, the same lyrics, the same cadence and the same self-pitying kid, dressed up like a cartoon character swearing about guns or drugs or racism or poverty or hoes or whatever else he found in Jesse Jackson's old sermons. You literally can't tell one song from another. And cripes, would it kill a new age rapper to rhyme a song that doesn't owe its entire existence to the vowel "e."

"Fast rapping self-degrading expletive is what I be.
Public schools taught me 1 'n 1 makes 3.
Ghetto pimp cruisin' smoking the wee
Hittin' round's of golf on Homie's Par Three
Drank too much Vodka, now I must go pee
Can't you see
You and me
Public schools say dat makes 3."

And there I sit, whilst suffering assaults from the vibration of the bass thinking to myself, "How can a human being even be slightly entertained by this total and utterly repetitive crap?" It's so mundane, so droning, I literally cannot see a sane human being purposely listening to that stuff. It is a question I don't think I will ever be able to answer...

However, the answer might lay elsewhere. For there is a group of people who exhibit the exact same behavior. And not only do they subject themselves to what would normally be repetitive, unoriginal and mind-numbing drivel, they also start to repeat it and promote it to anybody they can. We call them "liberals."

Not that liberals like rap, but they listen to and regurgitate the same garbage, all the time, with the same amount of originality, creativity, thought and passion as these two-bit rappers. Perhaps you have heard of some of their songs?

"Tax Cuts Only Benefit the Rich."
"Republicans are Racist."
"Democrats are for the Little Guy"
"Global Warming is Real and Caused by Capitalism"
"Black Conservatives are Uncle Toms."
"The Public Schools Need More Money."
"George Bush is a Moron."
"Women are Making Less than Men."
"I Hate Wal-Mart."
"It's All About Oil."
"I Hate Corporate America"
"Outsourcing Jobs is Horrible for America."
"Haliburton."

Played over and over and over again to the point you can finish their sentences for them. And I guarantee you, over the next month you will hear a choir led by John Kerry;

"Education, Health Care and Jobs."

But my personal favorite all time hit, made extremely popular by the Baby Boomer generation, which every good liberal knows by heart is the popular tune;

"The Rich Get Richer and the Poor Get Poorer."

Of all the chanted mantras of the left, this is the most defining and encompassing one (and deafening). It succinctly summarizes their ideology. It provides a rationale for the transfer of income. It victimizes a group. It's palatable to the masses and resonates well with them. It plays off of peoples' self-pity. And it is played over and over and over and over again as if it were a broken record and a team of union members were on hand to ensure it played forever.

This cliche has so permeated our society, that everybody uses it without thinking about it. College students, lacking any real education, knee-jerk-reaction it during their childish-level debates. Workers, white collar or blue, recite it every year when they get their raises. It is so well drafted and cunning that it can be said by any one, not give away their ideology, yet advance the goals of socialism. And there we sit, listening to it as if we're a 19 year old boy trying to impress the girls with a crappy car, a crappy stereo, but above all, a crappy tune.

But for such a popular tune that is sung en masse without thinking twice, don't you think maybe we should check it out to see if it's at least true???

I mean, sure the democrats, liberals, socialists and other varied sorts of leftists are going to believe what they want to believe, regardless of whether it's true or not (as evidenced by their incredible ability to search high and low- if not, create- their own data that supports what they want to believe). But as Conservatives, Libertarians, Republicans and other varied sorts of Capitalists we adhere (or at least I hope you all do) to intellectual honesty. We are not concerned about thinking, we are concerned about knowing. We are actually concerned about the truth.

Well take a look below.




And what do you know? If you go and pull the latest income distribution figures (from that incredibly biased tool of the Right Wing Conspiracy, the US Census Bureau) you'll find that the old socialist adage "The Rich Get Richer and the Poor Get Poorer" is only about half right. The tune should go a little more something like;

"The Rich Get Richer and the Poor Get Richer Too!"

But wait! How could this possibly be? Democrats and their socialist brethren have been telling us for years that only the rich get richer. And not only do the rich get richer, they get richer at the expense of the poor by making them poorer. Surely they wouldn't be telling us only what we wanted to hear, providing us a convenient scapegoat for the lack of our own personal financial success. Surely they wouldn't lie about income distribution to sow the seeds of class warfare, divide the nation and in a "For a Fistfull of Dollars" scenario play one side against the other for their own political gain. Would they?

Sorry kiddies, looks like you've been sold a bill of goods. One need only to look at John Edwards and his own personal broken-record tune called;

"Two Americas."

Or listen to Hillary Clinton's platinum hit;

"We're Going to Take Things Away from You for the Common Good."

Or Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton and the choir who prompted the infamous tune;

"The Reparations Rap." (which really would have been cool to link you to the lyrics, but the song was so stupid and counterproductive to their cause, I think it's been obliterated from the Internet forever, if anyone finds a copy of it, let me know)

Now I'd like to leave it here, pour myself a scotch and pat myself on the back for dealing another blow to socialism, but alas, I can't. For you must be warned. For working 'round the clock in a never ending attempt to undermine the forces of capitalism are Academians. Sitting atop pristine campuses, adorned with reject, 1970's minimalist architecture, are professors who could never break into the real world/private sector if their lives depended on it. And knowing full well their money at least in part comes from the government, they are always eager to prove why their paymaster should get more money. Therefore, they THINK of rationales and reasons to ignore the truth and purport falsehoods such as "The Rich Get Richer, While the Poor Get Poorer." Thus you can expect the following argument;

"Well, yes, technically real incomes are going up for everybody. But relatively incomes for the poor and middle class are going down while they go up for the rich."


So let me translate this for you. What the Academian is saying is that as a percent of total income, the poor and middle class' share is going down. Never mind that real incomes for the poor have gone up by 42%, and roughly 30% for the middle class, because the rich (those evil bastards) have had their real incomes go up by about 90%. Thus the poor are getting poorer relative to the rich.

In other words, if you get a 10% raise, but your neighbor gets a 20% raise, you are poorer and should complain. Democrats and socialists would argue that not only should you complain, but you should be entitled to some of your neighbor's 20% raise.

Like I said, they will believe in whatever they want to believe.

Now with this new found knowledge, no doubt I see you fancying yourself at a party, in the midst of a heated debate, waiting impatiently for the token party liberal to blurt out "yeah man, you know, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer." And then like a crouched ninja, patiently waiting in the shadows you strike with unseeable speed. And with infinitely superior knowledge (and a conveniently set up Power Point point presentation to display all these figures) you slay your rival in but a nano-second.

Soon you are surrounded by girls, fawning over you, saying "Oooo! I used to like the pansy, sensitive 90's type philosophy major, but there's something different about you...you're so, so manly!" And that's where you say, "That's right Baby, I'm an economist."

And you'd be right to fancy yourself in this situation because it happens all the time. There isn't an economist in the world, who after handily defeating a liberal at a party, wasn't marauded by droves of women.

But before you you start collecting numbers and leave your defeated leftist friend on the ground, it might be worth kicking him while he's down there just for good measure. For liberals, like the knight in Monty Python's "Search for the Holy Grail" don't know when they're defeated and don't know when to stay down.

A further criticism of income distribution figures is that they do not account for what are called "income transfers." Things such as social security, welfare and the whole host of other income security programs out there. These income transfers, by and large, transfer money from the richer quintiles of society and transfer them to the lower quintiles. In other words, the income distribution figures overstate the absolute and relative income of the rich and understate the absolute and relative wealth of the poor. Sadly no adjustments are made to the figures to account for this, but if any criticism is to be levied against those figures, it would be in your favor.

But before I go, I want to leave you all with the lyrics to the now debunked song. Perhaps we can write a new one, that has a little bit more originality than a rap song and 100% more truth than a liberal one;

"The Rich Get Richer and the Poor Get Poorer"

"The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.
You exploit us you bourgeois scumbags.
Give me my money, you owe it to me
You stole it from me and my family.
You oppress us.
We abandoned God so he won't bless us
Subsidize my worthless college degree purely for my enjoyment.
Then when I can't find a job, you can pay me unemployment.
Give us the money for any reason
We'll create 20 new ones a season.
It's not my fault that my life sucks,
Break out your checkbook and give me some bucks
Yooooooooou rich bastards."

Monday, September 25, 2006

Americans Hate to Work

So I've been comissioned to draft a seminar on developing models to predict default and delinquency using credit scores.

Sexy, yes, I know.

But in my research, I happened upon some data from Freddie Mac that makes me sick and warrants a lecture to be delivered to the lazy Americans who think that borrowing money against their house is a substitute for working.



These people literally anger me as they're the ones now who are whining and complaining about banks foreclosing on them because they were too stupid to read how ARM's work and got pinched when the short term rates adjusted.

Anyway, if you wanted a more lengthy, deep-thinking post, read the post below. Pulling old posts up because I'm dedicating a fair amount of time in preparation for busy season.

Vast Prosperity Begat "The Mystery" - Repost

One of the more popular local radio shows in the Twin Cities area is called Garage Logic. And one of the running gigs they have is “the Mystery.” “The Mystery” is where you would have people lobbying their city council to ban leaf blowers because of the pollution and noise. Or middle-aged, gray ponytailed Baby Boomers protesting the war on the bridges spanning over the Mississippi. Or overzealous do-gooders passing smoking bans.. At first it seemed to confuse the host so much that I wrote this theory as to explain “The Mystery.” Then it dawned on me that if “The Mystery” were solved, the whole "Mystery" gig wouldn't fly anymore. Kind of like preventing Niles and Daphney from ever getting together. However, I think the insights provided in my explanation does explain these people’s behavior and to a larger extent what ultimately drives liberals. Hope you enjoy.

The epitome of the mystery is that there are people out there who act, say, and believe things that are completely illogical. They then give you an incredibly weak or obscure rationale as to why they do, say or believe such things. This can range from a government worker demanding higher pay when they’re already paid 30% more than their private sector counterparts, to a mob of students destroying the downtown Seattle area in protest against globalization, to an environmentalist claiming that cutting your lawn with a weed whacker emits 2 million pounds of greenhouse gases into the environment.

At first glance they are seemingly unrelated. However, there is a common thread they share and this is the solution, the reason why there is the mystery;

They refuse to adhere to reality because they are lazy.

It is quite a link to claim that an environmentalist who insists a sole weed whacker emits 2 million pounds of greenhouse gases does so because he doesn’t want to adhere to reality because his is lazy, but let me make several daring and dangerous links.

First off, there is a reality. There is a real world. It is the world we all live in, and whether we accept it or not, we have no choice but to abide by it.

Governing this real world are many laws, but two undeniable laws in particular are related to The Mystery;

One, in order for a society to survive they must produce the goods and services necessary for survival and produce them more efficiently should society wish to improve standards of living.

Two, it is human nature to be lazy – i.e. to get more for less.

It is these two undeniable (and diametrically opposed) laws that necessitate an economic system that is based in reality. This economic system must be based in human nature and what they are prone to do, not in human kindness or what we would hope for them to do. It is because of this that capitalism is the most efficient and successful economic system and any attempts otherwise, as evidenced by the former Soviet Union, current day North Korea, former Marxist Ethiopia, Cuba, etc., are bound to fail.

Therefore, capitalism is not debatable, it is reality.

However, capitalism is not infallible and has one great weakness;

It has a tendency to spoil its participants.

Be it a Baby Boomer who had the luxury of growing up during the post WWII economic boom turned 60’s radical, leftist, anti-war hippie, or their modern day suburbanite anti-globalization protestor equivalent, both share a common trait;

They largely owe their unrivalled standards of living, employment, and wealth to capitalism, ie-vast prosperity.

Yet at the same time capitalism is so successful that it effectively shields them from the harsh realities of life. And without having to work, strive or suffer for that wealth, these people, especially when growing up, not only take such high standards of living, employment and wealth for granted, but consider them rights and entitlements.

It is this dichotomy that creates the environment in which The Mystery can form. On one hand, capitalism is providing for the livelihood of an individual. But at the same time spoils the individual so much that he/she can afford to revert back to their lazy human nature and purport the most outlandish theories and ideologies that are not based in reality but rather in their own selfish, human nature desires. This disconnect from reality and intentional ignorance of how capitalism/the real world works effectively allows a person to “have their cake and eat it too.” The result is a person can then live off the system, using whatever excuse or rationale to forego responsibility and hold beliefs or live a lifestyle that runs contradictory to what we Garage Logicians know to be fact, truth, reality and logical.

Having said that, it would seem only spoiled children can be Mysterians presuming that once they entered the real world, and were forced to get jobs to support themselves they would become adults and grow up. However, two things effectively prevent this. One, capitalism is so successful that a good portion of the population can (and in some cases are) being taken care of by their parents’ money well into their 40’s, and some trust fund babies, indefinitely. Two, over the course of the past 30 years, a system has been installed in our society that allows people (wealthy or not) the option of never having to get a real job, with real work, effectively shielding them from the real world for the entirety of their adult lives, namely what I call the “non-private sector;”

Academia, NGO’s, the public sector, non-profit industries, etc.

Thus, instead of real jobs in the private sector where competition inevitably forces production, efficiency, and the reality that one must work hard to succeed, one can now major in philosophy, women’s studies, Hyphenated-American studies, sociology, communications and the uber-Mysterian “peace studies.” And no longer do they have to get jobs as a machinist, an accountant, a doctor, a janitor, a chef, a customer service rep or somebody else that produces and contributes to society. But rather they can become sociology professors, psychology professors, philosophy professors, diversity counselors, grant writers, professional protestors, activists, lobbyists, journalists, career politicians, trial lawyers and a plethora of other equally worthless careers which compose the vast majority of Euphorians’ and Mysterians’ employment.

While this explains the incentives or at least the rationale of the Eurphorians and Mysterians it does not explain why they make such outlandish statements or are so adamant in their protests. Why they are so vocal, and zealous in establishing their cause. Why we see some many examples of The Mystery so frequently. However, this is very simple to explain;

Job security.

Realize the vast majority of these Mysterian careers are NOT demanded by the free market and must be imposed on the taxpayer by force via the government or people must be guilt-tripped into donating money to their cause. Therefore lobbying, protesting, and legislating are part of the game to protect their “industry.” Furthermore, in order to GROW their “industry” they use a technique that provides us with the majority of instances of The Mystery today;

Criminalizing other entities, industries, groups of people, etc.

Tobacco companies, fast food companies, oil companies, white men, rich white men, rich white oil men in Texas, the WTO, the IMF, the military, the CIA, John Ashcroft, big business, capitalism, pharmaceuticals, NAFTA, America, cars, Haliburton, SUV’s, even mold, are all targets of the Mysterians because they represent future or at least potential cash flows in the future, but at minimum, a continuation of their “causes.”

The problem with attacking or criminalizing these groups is that these groups aren’t evil, malicious, or criminal. All things being said they are products of reality and the free market. At worst they are a government policy attempting to respond to reality. The SUV is in response to the demands of a free people in a free market. Unhealthy fat food is in response to the demands of a free people in a free market. The military is in response to the fact people don’t like us and the government attempts to protect us. And rich white men are more often than not the result of hard work, studying, and creativity. And thus, in order to criminalize them Mysterians must fabricate a rationale or reason that is not based in reality, or at best has some really shoddy evidence to support their claim. This is where you see cardiac-arrest-inducing examples of The Mystery at play in the real world:

Global warming exists and is brought on by the automobile.

You are fat because McDonald’s made you that way.

You are poor and your life sucks because of racist, sexist white men.

People who drive bigger cars are endangering those of us who drives SPECS.

This, if for any other reason, is why we have been unable to solve The Mystery. Because we focus on the cause or crusade and its inanity and not what drives the people behind it. Realize, it doesn’t matter what the cause or crusade is because the cause or crusade is fabricated for an ulterior motive. It could just as well be global warming as it is sex discrimination, because the ulterior motive is nothing as noble as protecting the environment or advancing the well-being of women. It’s not about eliminating racism. It’s not about the ethical treatment of animals. The only thing it’s about is the Mysterian. Providing and securing the Mysterian a career for some fabricated cause. Giving them some self-concocted sense of pseudo self-worth. Furnishing them with an utterly hollow rationale that somehow “they’re contributing to society.” In short providing them a lifestyle void of responsibility and reality.

It is nothing as noble as helping 3rd World children and absolutely nothing resembling the real world or the truth.

This is why you have The Mystery. This is why you will never see the NAACP or Jesse Jackson even admit to an improvement in race relations. This is why schools will always be underfunded and will cry bloody murder and child abuse if you just hold their budgets steady. This is why the environment will forever be on the apocalyptic verge of destruction even if we ban the automobile. This is why you can have a women’s studies professor claim she is 100% independent while in reality she is the trophy wife of the public sector. This is why you have Arriana Huffington and Mark Dayton inheriting their money going on political crusades to make themselves feel better. This is even arguably why you have the son of a rich Saudi millionaire flying planes in our buildings to make up for his inability to survive without his Daddy’s money. Simply because people are lazy and do not want to put forth the required effort to face up to and succeed in the real world nor do they want to succumb to a career that they view as “beneath them.” And it is just so much easier to ignore reality, claim you’re a victim, claim you’re a crusader for some “noble cause,” villanize targeted groups, and just outright lie especially when a system is in place to foster and encourage such behavior.

I hope this helps explain The Mystery or at least maybe proposes some new theories about it.

Good luck!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Hugo vs. Bush

So I figure with Hugo Chavez claiming our president is the devil and such a bad man, and many of you socialists in America agreeing with him, that maybe this might be an appropriate time to dispense a measure of "REALITY." So I took a look at some various socio-economic figures between Bush and Hugo over the past 6 years, to compare the left's hero versus the "devil's" 6 years in office thus far.

GDP per capita under Bush vs. Hugo


Real GDP Growth under Hugo vs. Bush



Unemployment under Hugo vs. Bush


Inflation under Hugo vs. Bush



Murders under Hugo vs. Bush


Corruption under Hugo vs. Bush (sorry, my bad, map was previously pointing to Peru. No offense meant to Peruvians)


But here's my favorite. Hugo Chavez, alleged hero of the left, advocate of the poor, who constantly slams on neo-liberalism and capitalism, joins forces with the few remaining communists left on the planet, Cuba and North Korea, who champions the confiscation of "rich people's" wealth to redistribute it to the poor HAS AN EVEN WORSE INCOME DISTRIBUTION THAN THAT EVIL COUNTRY UNDER THAT EVIL CAPIALIST DICTATOR GEORGE BUSH!!!


(to be intellectually honest I would like an updated gini coefficient if anybody has it)

And we have to listen to this 52-year-old-come-spoiled-breat-18-year-old-Chomsky-college-student-reading schmuck-putz lecture us about Bush being the devil???

It is glaringly obvious that Hugo has no desire to actually help the poor people in his country or the rest of the world, it's just about him and clinging to power and feeding his ego. And for all you leftist hypocrites out there who actually endorse this scumbag under the guise, "he's advocating socialism and helping out the poor" WHEN HE HAS A WORSE GINI COEFFICIENT THAT THE UNITED STATES it just shows the rest of us the truth;

That you're absolutely not about helping the poor as much as you are being anti-American or so utterly stupid that you will bring this great country down and lose those precious social freedoms you cherish so much because of your ignorance.

You literally should be ashmed of yourself for such stupidity, hypocrisy and being so damn gullible.

Math Tells Me Yes, But My Heart Tells Me No

So there are many indicators I look at that to me would predict a recession, but probably the biggest one I look at (probably more because it was something pointed out to me so long ago) was that housing starts were an excellent leading indicator to the rest of the economy. Usually with a 6-12 month lag, when housing starts tank, recessions usually ensue. And ever since the FRED Database at the St. Louis Federal Reserve started imbedding them there nice slim shaddy (get it, "shaddy" because they're gray, like shade, but with the doubling meaning on the obvious ploy of Eminem's song "Slim Shaddy" huh? Get it? The pun I mean???) to indicate recessions, it helps make it very easy to illustrate my point.



However, it wasn't necessarily the contraction of GDP that tipped me off to the correlation as much as it was how housing starts and unemployment act like a double helix;


Now there are many things that would suggest to me that we're in for a recession. The obvious correlations above. The fact that consumer spending financed by fat-debt-bloated Americans with their addicted home-equity-loan spending has been having an artifical effect on the growth of the economy (and without perpetually increasing property prices this binge will end).


The utter patheticness of Gen X and future generations insisting on majoring in crap. And let's not forget all of this under the umbrella of constant threats from Muslim nutjobs, with a whimper weak retort from American's "leaders," and the impending social security and medicare crisis.

But it just ain't in my blood. I don't "feel" a recession coming on. It's odd, but contrary to all the mathematical evidence I have, I just got this gut feeling that the economy will be doing just fine for the next 12-16 months.

Alas, perhaps I'm one of the few economists that hasn't had the soul of economics kicked out of me and instead of replacing it with advanced econometrics, statistics, mathematics and models that no matter how complex are still finite, I still have a little faith in chaos, gambling and gut reactions.

Wal-Mart is Just SOOOOO EVIL!!!!

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20060921/D8K9A7TO7.html

The socialists always focus on what Wal-Mart pays its employees, ie-how much people make. They never focus on what truly matters, as it is purchasing power that really determines standards of living.

This is going to drive them nuts; a large, profitable US corporation doing what they couldn’t do in 30 years; delivering cheap drugs to the poor.

Morons.

Scott Stantis at It Again

So I'm OK with the ladies.

I'm better with words.

And I'm great with charts.

But Scott has a tendency to wipe me clean on all accounts with his pictures.



As I've said before, go visit him because I don't know how legal it is for me to post his cartoons here.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

A Much Needed Repost - You Go for Hugo? I Go for Hugo? We All Go for Hugo!

Given Hugo Chavez's comments at the UN recently, I think it necessary to highlight this putz's track record. Additionally I will reinterate my insistence people boycott Citgo;

Since Hugo Chavez seems to be in the news a lot recently being visited by Harry Belafonte and Cindy Sheehan and other varied enemies of the US, I thought it would be beneficial to the readers to highlight Venezuela in a similar fashion that I did Ireland.

Hugo took over in 1998 and ever since then everything has more or less gone down the toilet. Then again what did you expect when a the self-proclaimed socialist revolutionary starts implementing socialist policies?

GDP has tanked, even during years when oil prices were high, and it wasn't until oil prices got stratospheric did they experience any growth until 2004. Of course none of this has to do with the people working harder or smarter, it just has to do with the price of a commodity increasing.



As GDP tanks, so too does a GDP per capita have a tendency to tank. Again, socialists seem more to care about every body being equally miserable than everybody being disproportionately better off.


The most watched TV show in Venezuela seems to be "That 70's Show" as it reminds them of the good ol' days when they were 33% richer. 40 years have passed and they join Africa in one of the few places on the planet where standards of living have actually decreased despite all these technological and commercial innovations and advances.


Remember how our economy was the "worst economy in 50 years!" That was with 6% unemployment. The beloved socialist policies the left in America would like to emulate would seem to triple that.

Also Hugo is no Alan Greenspan.
So with chronic deterioration in standards of living, Great Depression levels of unemployment, and all accelerated under the rule of Chavez, how do ordinary Venezuelans repsond?


Alas, it seems 70.5% of the Venezuelans are idiots.


But at least some of their women are pretty hot.

Boycott Citgo, DUH!

This was from NOVEMBER OF 2005. This is why I'm called the "captain." Additionally, I'd like to point out just what a traitorous slob Ted Kennedy is.

So JFK stands up to the communists during the Cuban Missile Crisis only to have his son (?) conspire with a communist for political gain.

http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/11/22/venezuela.us.fuel.ap/index.html

What's sad is the poor people of Boston are not going to see through this farse and think that Chavez and communism are great things. Little do they realize that Venezuelans have seen their standards of living decrease since Hugo came into power and the same would be in store for them if communism were enacted here.

I'll also bet two things;

1. Liberals and democrats will patronize Citgo as Hugo pulls off more and more attention-getting stints like this.
2. Conservatives and Republicans are so placated in their suburbia cookie cutter world, they're too stupid to boycott Citgo.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Yeah, Right. "Evil" Corporations


Next time some spoiled brat socialist whines and gripes about how corporations are evil and that they don't pay their fair share, I'm going to ask them how many social programs $71.8 billion would finance.

The Best of Captain Capitalism – Oil Posts

Hey Kids,

Are you sick and tired of the other kids on the block regurgitating their bumper sticker sound bytes about how Bush orchestrated the drop in oil prices for the election?

Tired of stupid, brainwashed leftist whiners going out of their way to abandon all rational thinking and logic so they can get their jollies off of subscribing to outlandish conspiracy theories?

Sickened by the utter hypocrisy of socialists who will disregard the pursuit of the truth and the well-being of the nation in order to make themselves feel like intellectuals and espouse ridiculous levels of stupidity?

Well, sit there in utter silence with your jaw on the floor as you cannot comprehend their stupidity no more when you hit them buck-side the back of their head with…(dun dun DUUUUNNNNN!)

Captain Capitalism’s REALITY!

Yes, REALITY!

The most surefire way to stop a blathering, uneducated socialist dead in their tracks.

Why suffer the pain and agony of mindless drivel when you can stop it before it starts? Why endure the headache while your brain tries in vain to comprehend the psychology of people pushing such outlandish theories? Why leave a perfectly good party when the socialists start spewing uninformed opinions because they actually think people want to hear what they want to say? Well leave happening parties no more with Captain Capitalism’s REALITY!

Just use one dose of REALITY on any blathering liberal and they’ll shut up, 100 GUARANTEED!!!

Don’t believe us? Well just listen to our customers’ testimonials!

Captain Capitalism Reader #1 – "I used to go to parties, like with all my liberal friends in college. And like they were all like totally going on about how Bush and Cheney controlled the supply of oil. And then I read Captain Capitalism’s post about who really owns all the oil reserves and found out that the US "Big Oil" companies really only control 2% of the world’s oil reserves. Likeohmygod! So I printed off the post and showed it to my friends and they sat there in silence and said, "whatever." So the next day they voted me out of the sorority because I violated their weight requirements, but ever since then they haven’t talked about big oil and Bush and Cheney! Thanks Captain!"

Captain Capitalism Reader #2 – "So I work at a public school and while in the teachers’ lounge I was listening to some of the other teachers talk about how they thought it was highway robbery paying $3.50/gallon for gas to fill their SUV’s. They blamed it on Bush. But then I pulled up this post on the Captain’s site and showed them that the high prices were really a combination of high global demand for oil, a limited refining capacity, China’s voracious demand, and a "risk premium" in the middle east, not to mention a weak dollar. Bush really had nothing to do with it. After that some men in trench coats from the teachers union beat me senseless with a tire iron, but at least the other school teachers don’t blather on about Bush and Big Oil anymore! Thanks Captain!"

Captain Capitalism Reader #3 – "Yo man. So I was like hangin with my homies and word up g, get dis. Al Sharpton comes up to me and says, "you know prices are coming down just because Bush wants his cronies getting re-elected." And I was like, "whoa, step-off man! That’s like crazy freaky sh!t because my man Captain Capitalism predicted you leftist perps would be push that sh!t on us, thinking we was some dumb flock o’ sheep willing to be brainwashed and follow you anywhere. Next thing you know you’d be saying some girl was raped by a bunch of white cops when she wasn’t. I owe it to my main man Captain C for keeping in the truth. Thanks Captain!"

SUFFER THE IDIOCY OF UNINFORMED LEFTISTS NO MORE!!!!

Use Captain Capitalism REALITY!

So what are you waiting for?

Order your very own dose of Captain Capitalism’s REALITY!

To order just go to http://captaincapitalism.blogspot.com/, print off your favorite posts and carry them with you to parties, college class, high school class, or a DNC convention!

And if you read on, you’ll get the latest post on the left’s idiocy with oil ABSOLUTELY FREE!!!
SO DON’T DELAY, READ IT RIGHT BELOW NOW!
******************************************************************
OK, so the latest drop in gas prices have triggered the now-to-be-expected-knee-jerk-reaction that when anything goes well under the Bush administration is was orchestrated to get his cronies elected and further send us down the path to totalitarianism.

Saddam Hussein
Al-Zarqawi
Now gas prices and I'm not joking, THE FREAKING SPINACH!!!

Ug. They complain when gas prices are too high because all of Bush’s Big Oil Buddies are making a mint, they complain when it’s low because it’s obviously a scheme to affect elections. Cripes, the stupidity is really jaw-dropping.

Now, I know, I know, you understand how the price of gas works; SUPPLY AND DEMAND. I understand this. And anybody with Jello for a brain will understand this, but for your standard leftists who really doesn’t have a brain, just more really a brain stem actually and is only capable of rote rehearsal and knee-jerk thinking, thus making them susceptible to conspiracy theories I’ve compiled a list here of reasons why gas prices have come down;

1. GDP has slowed slightly from its previous break neck speed of 5.9% down to 2.9% thereby lowering demand for oil.

2. BP’s oil pipeline problems are not as severe as they previously thought.

3. This minor discovery of oil in the Gulf of Mexico that potentially could boost US reserves by 50%.

4. Summer driving season is over.

Understand when you pose these figures/facts to your hot air socialist friends a set of behaviors will occur;

1. They’ll shut up for a couple seconds.
2. The next word out of their mouths will be "Well."
As in "well…ummm…you know…"
Or as in "well, that’s uhhh…because…"

since they don't know what to say because their brain just got served.

3. They will inevitably ignore the glaring evidence you’ve pointed to in front of them as being irrelevant and denying the truth.

4. They will then move on to another topic of conversation.

Now, I’ve receive many complaints from consumers of Captain Capitalism’s REALITY in that it doesn’t convince leftists they’re wrong.

I have to make a clarification here.

Captain Capitalism’s REALITY has made no claims about being able to convert leftists. All it claims to do is get them to shut up. That’s all. Getting a leftist to admit they’re wrong and convert into a capitalist requires something much more Herculean, a life-shattering event that changes their outlook on life…something like them supporting themselves and paying taxes or a Bolshevikian Revolution followed by 70 years of misery and 40 million deaths.

That being said, please feel free to use Captain Capitalism’s REALITY. Something tells me between now and November we’ll need it regarding this gas price tripe.

(PS-I noticed that nobody is clicking on the links, THAT'S WHERE THE REALLY GOOD CHARTS ARE!!!! And they're very pretty too, I used lot's of colors)

Monday, September 18, 2006

If I Hear About How We Use Slave Labor One More Time...

I love purchasing power parity. The concept (actually, reality) that what really matters is purchasing power, not the nominal wage a person is paid.

Now, your standard trophy wife sitting in the suburbs whose husband makes all the real money while she contemplates how to make her child psychology degree mean something, sits there and after watching "The View" looks around and says, "gosh, I'm pathetic. I haven't done anything with my life. But I must do something, because my 1970's brainwashing tells me to do so."

Of course most of us know that it would be best if she did NOTHING. That she didn't think, that she sat there innoculated from the rest of the world and continued on to eat her bon bons and leave the world be.

But oh no, they have to go on a crusade.

Now, one of these many crusades they decide to go on is fighting for the poorer people of the world. To fight against "slave labor" and to buy coffee from shops that pay a "living wage."

So with little thinking they read in Mother Jones or what have you that the "poor children of country X are paid 43 cents per decade and must eat shrubs to live" and it's all the fault of rich people in the US (of course they'd be paid NOTHING if it weren't for us, so I guess 43 cent is worse than nothing). Regardless, this is why there's this trend to go "organic" and shop at places like Whole Foods amongst the upper classes.

The problem is that when these wage figures are quoted, they are not adjusted for purchasing power. Yes, of course Akbar may make $3/day which in New York City will get you nothing. But in Indonesia it has the equivalent purchasing power of say $25. It's not too unlike

"how much will $10 buy you in Des Moines, Iowa" - Answer 3 heads of cattle, 40 acres of farmland, your own personal F-16 fighter plane and a keg of beer.

versus

"how much will $10 buy you in San Francisco." - parking for 20 minutes.

So to make purchasing power parity understandable, even to the suburbanite trophy wives that could never pass high school algebra, the good men and women at UBS put together this spiffy chart that shows you how long it takes to earn the money to buy a very standard and universal good;

The Big Mac.


I recall being a poo-shoveller making $3.15/hr in the 7th grade, which is about as long as it takes for your average China man to earn the same amount of money for a Big Mac.

"Slave labor" my ass.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Obsession

So hands down the best movie in the world is Die Hard. No arguing about it, Bruce Willis was fighting terrorism back in 1988! Shows you just how cool he is!

Regardless saw a movie here in Minneapolis that is almost, ALMOST as good. Additionally it's also a documentary. Which would be kind of like when I was in high school, finding a novel that was almost as good as a comic book, but we all know even the best novel can't be as good as the worst comic book.

Anyway, the move is called Obsession. No doubt some of you are aware of it, but if you haven't seen it I'd recommend doing so. If I'm reading the web sites correctly, unfortunately it's only being shown in Minneapolis (which is in part why they'd like to get exposure so they could get nationwide showings). And it's only being shown until THURSDAY.

Here are the show times and locations.

A DVD release will be coming.

Anyway, I'm plugging the movie not because I have a hand in it, but because it really is worth seeing. Not just for evil fascist, right wingers like myself, but for pretty much anybody interested in what makes Muslims tick, and drives some of them to hating you so much they'd like to blow you up even though you've never met them. (It may also go to explain some of the behavior we've seen recently in some of my posts below).

NOT A DATE MOVIE HOWEVER! Kind of more of the serious strain. You know, 3 year olds chanting how they want to blow themselves up to kill Bush and Sharon. Doesn't really put the girl in the mood. Maybe go with the guys. But definitely take some of these nut jobs from the "all cultures are equal" crowd and the brainwashed PC "you can't criticize Islam" crowd. It would make for some excellence silence on their part.

Friday, September 15, 2006

Muslims Have Humor


Once you move out of the medieval ages and join the rest of the world we'll apologize.

From My Beloved Sister

One of her friends had a child and she put her doctorate wisdom to use and made this little motivational poster;


You may laugh, but as I've pointed out before, the fertility rate and standards of living are inversely related and children do bring about stupidity.

Drudge Has a Sense of Humor

Who gives a f#ck?


What else is new?

Really, the Muslims are in a rage over the Pope? Really? No kidding. You mean the same people that killed others because of some political cartoons are easily set off. Wow, who would have guessed.

God, what a sad life to lead. Think about that for a second. Some head of some religion quotes some book of his religion 2,000 miles away, and your life is so void of meaning and you LITERALLY HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO that this is all it takes to get you to take precious and finite minutes and piss it away burning flags??!!!???!!!!

Much as I want to kill terrorists and radicals, something tells me they live in their own hell.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

How Much You Wanna Bet...

That it's only a matter of time before socialist conspiracy idiots (that would be the mainstream democratic party) starts spewing bumpersticker soundbytes that George Bush is behind the dramatic drop in gas prices in a blantant attempt to affect the 2006 election?


I was going to suggest perhaps the slowing of the GDP growth coinciding with the end of the summer travel season, but that's just too damn logical now isn't it?

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

I Left My Heart in Deadwood, South Dakota

Greetings fellow economists from Spear Fish, South Dakota!

I admit the above title doesn't quite have the ring Tony Bennett or Dean Martin gave San Francisco, BUT

there is no sweeter music to my ears than winning enough at Black Jack to pay for not only lodging but drinks as well.

Sadly I had to leave the black jack table with my winnings and continue on in my pursuit to study the Black Hills as a potential for investment property, but I'll always fondly remember Deadwood.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Transparent as Glass

Hey kids and junior deputy economists, before you read on, make sure to read this and then this .

OK, you can go on now.

From CAIR's web site.





http://www.cair-net.org/default.asp?Page=articleView&id=2250&theType=NR


ALLEGED? Worried about stereotyping????

How about you guys try this;

"WE'RE SORRY!"

I think you'll get a little further along in your aims in admitting its Muslim radical freaks that are causing this instead of immediately going to defend these dogs. And maybe a condemnation of the action? HMMMM???

Saturday, September 9, 2006

Know Anybody Out in Rapid City?

Hey aspiring and junior deputy economists.

As you know I'm enroute to Rapid City for my well-deserved vacation.

That being said I know nothing of the social life there and outside camping and scoping out a couple investments DOES ANYBODY KNOW ANYBODY IN RAPID CITY???

I checked the Rapid City Journal and it seems all the have is kareoke and square dancing!!!

Getting...weak...need...jazz....must have...martini...cannot..fight...the...achey...breaky...heart... Line...dancing...weakening...brainwaves....must....find...copy of....Economist

E-mail me captcapitalism@yahoo.com if one would be so kind to line me up with a guide.

Friday, September 8, 2006

If the Shoe Were on the Other Foot...

I remember this girl called "Michelle" whose last name escapes me now.

Life-long academian, will never amount to anything, will never contribute one penny to GDP. Will just bitch and whine about everything while she pursues her anthropology degree at San Diego State.

She happened to be Asian.

And on a political discussion board she made (and vehemently defended) that only white people can be racist.

Now normally thinking people...heck, just plain THINKING people will realize this is not only utterly stupid, but truly racist. Because of your skin color only whites can be racist?

I can see it now;

"Me? Oh, I'm not white, so I can spit in your face, burn effigies of white people (or any other people as well I suppose) and should I ever become an HR director discriminate and only hire Asians because I'm not white and thus, it's genetically impossible for me to discriminate."

Idiocy.

Now, I'd like to chalk that up to just one enormously stupid and bigotted person. To think that because they're not white, they are incapable of discrimination and prejudice.

I guess I was wrong.

For you see Swanblog went and found something interesting.

His post is a bit lengthy, but the jist of it is there was a coalition of minority lawyer groups in the Twin Cities that wanted to throw a Shrimp Boil. Which is all fine and good. Until you go to the invite which I've posted below incase they take it down.



Now truth be known, I'm all for their right to choose to discriminate on who they let into their little party. If all participating members and groups decided not to let whites in, fine, it's their party, not as diverse as it could be, racist by definition if you're using race as a qualifier to attend the party, but hey, it's not my gig.

But could you imagine what would happen if the reverse was done? That instead of the Asian, Hispanic, Black, etc. lawyers guild exlcuding non-minorities the "Norwegian, British, Irish French" lawyers guild excluded minorities??? You'd have an endless assault of law suits and more media coverage than 9-11.

I guess it truly is only whites that can be racist.

A Couple Posts Before I Go

Saw this movie.

Great movie, don't get me wrong, but it wasn't anything I didn't already know, but it just made things much more clear.

The footage alone of a 3 year old Muslim girl telling the interviewer she thinks Jews come from apes and monkeys, or literally the DOZEN of different 5-8 year old girls saying they want to kill Bush and see Sharon burn, makes it worth seeing just to see how effed up these people are.

Additionally to see how they portray Jews making "matzo" (I think) in a movie where the Jews sacrifice a Christian boy for his blood to make this food (which presumably is accepted lore in the Arabic world) AND the borderline identical hate-propaganda of the Nazis and the Muslims against the Jews was just amazing.

Regardless, if you are not a Neville Chamberlain type and have your head out of your ass, it will just remind you of the severity of the situation (that are you can just have your jaw drop when you see Brigitte Gabriel come on screen - show looks better in the movie)

Where it would be particularly moving is if you showed it to some of these brainwashed sheople protestor types who think "George Bush is the real terrorist."

The Adventures of Captain Capitalism in Rapid City!

Hey All,

Well here's the quick one two;

Thanks to Neal Boortz I got 15,000+ hits in one day. Not to mention over 100 posts/e-mails. Oddly I didn't think it one of my best posts so you should read ALL my posts, tell friends and drive my stats up to the point I don't have to work ever again. Otherwise you are a triple commie weenie.

Unfortunately I won't be able to respond to every e-mail and post but I did want to give you all a sincere thanks for visiting my site.

Second, remember it is your Patriotic and American Duty to tune into The Economics Supper Club this Saturday where I, your host, Captain Capitalism will dispense even MORE wisdom. You can listen online here and call in;

Long distance; 1-877-615-1500
Short distance; 651-646-8255

Saturday from 1-3PM CENTRAL STANDARD TIME

If you don't, you are a QUADRUPLE DOUBLE COMMIE WEENIE ACADEMIAN!

123noquits!!!!

Thirdly, immediately after the show I'm heading out to Rapid City, South Dakota for a well earned vacation. Well, actually, it isn't a vacation, but more an expedition to scope out property out there as I wouldn't mind retiring in the Black Hills. That being said I'll try to get some fossil hunting in, hiking in, and bring back some pretty pictures. I also want to gamble in Deadwood with a blond, western type moll on my arm because this is America and I deserve it.

The whole point, posts will be a little slow if any for the next couple of days. I'll try to post something though.

Thursday, September 7, 2006

Why Emulate Europe?

So The Economist came out with this chart.


And if you noticed the same thing I did, it's missing the United States.

So I did two things;

1. I pulled the RGDP growth figures for the US from the OECD to get a comparison.
2. I went back 3 years for the above chart only does the annualized growth from the 2nd quarter of 2005 to the 2nd quarter of 2006 and therefore really isn't a fair comparison of these countries' abilities to produce wealth over the long run.


Heh heh.

So I ask the question, why is it the left wishes to emulate Europe so badly? I mean, sure, they have free health care (technically so do we) and free education, but fast forward 40 years into the future applying the same 3 year average growth rates to current GDPs/capita and this is the standards of living we'll have (I am aware of some of the mathemtical short-comings of this calcualtion, but it's just a ball park figure. Please don't be anal retentive and point them out as to some vast, gapping oversight on my part. Additionally, upon further thought, I will do a more comprehensive calculation and put up a super spiffy chart addressing this).



Don't you think by this time we'd be able to afford decent health care coverage for all people and it would take a mere fraction of our GDP unlike the current 15% it does now? I mean, you think about it, if you allow an economy to grow, that growth will wipe out more poverty, provide for more schools, health care, etc. etc., that it will effectively dwarf those social ailments. Allowing the economy to grow does more to wipe out poverty than any government social program ever could.

Meanwhile all the left can do is froth at the mouth about redistributing wealth NOW with little regard as to the consequences it will have on the country's ability to produce wealth in the future.

If only the left actually gave a damn about the poor enough to the point they'd take an economics class.

Sunday, September 3, 2006

Is Comic Book Guy a Terrorist?????

This is another example of what I've been talking about.

His name is Adam Gadahn. This is a before and after picture;


Tell me if I'm wrong, but he looks like one of those fat kids that played too much dungeons and dragons in high school and couldn't land a date if he had a billion dollars (although I think he's finding out terrorists don't have unlimited access to Twinkies in caves). Rather than just become the next Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons, he decides to join Al-Qaida so he can feel like he belongs and be an instant hero. If this isn't the perfect example of somebody who is so greedy and evil that he puts his ego ahead of the lives of millions of innocent people, I don't know what is.

The funny thing is, he'll be a virgin not only on this planet, but in the afterlife as well, because methinks he won't be going where there are 72 virgins.

Saturday, September 2, 2006

We're For Independent Thought...Just as Long as You Think Like Us

One of the biggest problems I have with primarily liberals and socialists, but Republicans and conservatives are to a lesser extent guilty as well, is how they have absolutely NO PROBLEM brainwashing their kid into a particular ideology before that kid is even the age of 10.

I've seen it at the fair where the parents have their kids carry some damn democratic candidate's balloon around. I've seen it at the Wellstone memorial/rallies/protests where the burnt-out, druggie-come-parent has their infant-kid wear a "Never Park the Bus" Wellstone t-shirt.

The hypocrisy is just so utterly repugnant.

On one hand you have a (typically) liberal who is all about independent thought, the freedeom of this, the freedom of that, moral relativism, nothing is "wrong or right" just different, and pushing open-mindedness, and dont' be so close minded, blah blah blah.

And on the other hand have absolutely no moral qualms about effectively brainwashing their kid at such a young age when all the kid wants to do is go out and play.

I can see it now at the household of the non-nuclear, modern day, hatred is not a family value, government employed granola democratic family;

"Johnny, time for your daily readings from Das Kapital"

"But Moooooommmm!!! Jimmy and Steve are going to the old pond, they said they saw some turtles there!!!"

"NO! What did I tell you about our daily devotionals at the dinner table. You are going to appreciate the values of communism if it's the last thing you do!"

Or heck, these parents who are so freaking green EVERYTHING HAS TO BE ORGANIC!

"Mom, can I have some ice cream?"

"No honey, that's Dairy Queen! They don't have all organic ice cream and probably treat their cows inhumanely."

"But Mooooooommmmm! Jimmy and Steve always get to go to Dairy Queen!"

"Yes, but we go to the Mother Gia Coffee and Ice Cream Haven. Here, have an all-organic scoop of barely-wheatgrass-ice cream. It's made in Kenya by workers who are paid a living wage!"

So you could imagine my infuriation when I read this post by Noahtorious.

At what point do you stop and say, "hey, you know, maybe childhood should be scared and void of brainwashing of any kind???? Maybe I should let my kid just have that childhood innocence and enjoy their youth without making him/her into nothing more than a brainwashed automaton like the radical islamic imams brainwash young boys into becoming suicide bombers?"

Why can't you just let the damn kid be a kid?

Of course, the reason why is two fold;

1. The left derives its value and meaning in life from being a "leftist." It's not, "I'm a good father" or "I run a good plastics firm" or "I'm the best auto-mechanic in town." It's, "I'm a leftist, I care about things and take on noble causes to help the disadvantaged." Translated into English that means, "I don't want get my hands dirty becoming an auto mechanic, besides, that would take effort, I just want to sit and bitch and moan and whine and become a professional activist while I fool myself into thinking it's for the "poor/children/disadvantaged" when in reality, deep down inside, I know it's for myself greedy psycho self and I just wish to masterbate my ego." When this is what the ENTIRE VALUE OF YOUR LIFE is based on, you'll have a tendency to foist such a "noble" philosophy on a 4 year old.

2. They're just plum afraid that if the kid did think about it, and actually had an independent thought, they may come to a different conclusion than their parents. Additionally, they may realize what frauds their parents actually are and hold them responsible for their situation. They might wake up one day and say, "Hey Mom, why was it you and Dad weren't married when you had me. And why was it you guys got divorced, and why did you go to all those protests instead of working up a college fund for me? And why did you prevent me from growing up with the rest of normally functioning society and instead instill this tripe in my psyche." (odd, but that sounds an awful lot like Christianity....HOOOOO! ZINGGGGGGG!!!!)

I'd love to see them explain to their children.

Of course, I already know the answer;

It's Bush's fault.

You Gonna Spend That?

So Japan and China have almost $1 trillion in foreign reserves each. And while I admire such fiscal austerity contrasted with the US' version of imitating a sorority girl with daddy's credit card, there's something to be critiqued about just holding onto cash and not investing it.


I'd be very curious to see if the Chinese government through all its SOE's (state owned enterprises) decides to go on a shopping spree.

Friday, September 1, 2006

Then and Now - Warning, Not Child Friendly

It’s been a while since I’ve done this, so it’s long over due.

As you may know I am a fan of the 1940’s where more or less I contest that it was the pinnacle of not only American culture, but of the entire world.

And to show you how far our culture has degraded into putresence and filth I occasionally pull the lyrics from a song from the halcyon days of America and compare to the lyrics of a song from modern day America.

This old tune is called "Red Roses For A Blue Lady," it’s one of the songs Dave Thompson plays as a bumper for his show;

"I want some red roses for a blue lady.
Mister florist take my order please
We had a silly quarrel the other day
I hope these pretty flowers chase her blues away

I want some red roses for a blue lady
Send them to the sweetest gal in town
And if they do the trick,
I'll hurry back to pick
Your best white orchid for her wedding gown

(I want some red roses for a blue lady)
We had a silly quarrel the other day
I hope these pretty flowers chase her blues away
I want some red roses for a blue, blue lady
Send them to the sweetest gal in town
And if they do the trick,
I'll hurry back to pick
Your best white orchid for her wedding gown
Your best white orchid for her wedding gown"

Now, let us compare and contrast that little ditty with Andre Nickitina’s popular tune; "Smoke Dope and Rap."

"I smoke chewy like a mother fucking nutYou got a grab bag hit the zags and roll her upCuz a nigga like me, cant fake it when im highGet the visine for the tight red eyesJumped in the Cutlass with the niggas from the setThe blunt went out, but we aint done yetGet another one blaze like its barbeque beefit aint nuttin like a blunt for the funk in ya teethyea, im a skinny 6'5" motherfuckerif u didnt know me, you would think i was a cluckerbut im not a clucker im a dodger and a duckercome a lil closer im a show u im a punch yaand if i cant beat u get my gun and im a buck yaturn u over like a bitch pull out my dick and im a fuck yalike a fiend for the weed ill tweak4 15's in ur trunk thats beatproper ass amps abco, alpineput the coke on the dash roll a dolla do a linepump RBL's maybe 1 2 3 or the funky shit by the I.M.Pnow im high like a motherfucking jetfuck a 9 to 5 im a juke on the setslang these thangs and fuck these hoes,one line at a time goes up a niggas nosethe shit clean my sinuses just like a showerindo or tide blend it in with the powdernow im chewy high with a hard ass dickooh there goes my pager could it be a trick bitchoooh its Janine, she licked my dick cleancum right away bring a dime bag of weed Like a nigga thats sick, caught up in the grooveKill the pussy bust a nut and like a vet stick and move Out of that house a quickie I know she got mad Because I killed it and I didn't bring the weed I did bring the weed but I left in the my Cutty Did you really think I would smoke some dank with you dummy? (yeah) No, Dre Dog won't die See my nigga Cougnut nigga let's get high He said I got the drank and you got the dank He said my nigga Dre Dog Frisco is the place For me to get high and you to get drunk We smoke dope we rap and these hoes we fuck Ooh I'm high as hell from snorting that girl Rush Mr. Cee so I could tie me up a curl Out that shop hoes do jock See my Cutty in a rag I will drop top See the freak on the block I think her name was Kim Just stole her in the Cutty like Iceberg Slim I said how you doin, my name is Dre Dog You give me your number I'll give you a call She said my hair looked proper as it blew in the wind But I can't have her number cuz I fucked her best friend It's a pity I'm a nigga that just don't care Except for my dope my money and hair Cuz everywhere I go it's the same damn song Nigga smoke more dope than Cheech and Chong I love to tell the truth but I'm such a good liar The Dre Dog nigga smoke more than Richard Pryor I'm true to the dope that I smoke no joke Check me right now there's a gram in my coat Cocaine blunts (what?) and hip hop tapes (what?) Rubber car keys and ID that's fake And rhymes do pay so my pockets do grow I snort so much snow that they should call me Dre Blow Cuz I don't drink beer I don't drink gin Bust the freak hit the pussy then I try to fuck her friends Dre Dog don't laugh ain't a damn thing funny When niggas talk to freaks who ain't got no money I done smoke enough blunts fool to fill my brain Chewy boy do me raw cut cocaine And niggas get pumped when they smell dank-a-roma When they smell dank-a-roma then they know I'm on the corner They offer me drank but I don't get drunk I smoke dope I rap and these hoes I fuck"

Yes, I’m sure it is only a matter of mere seconds before the culture of Hip Hop ushers in a cultural renaissance for America.