Law - The strength of a rationalization hamster is inversely related to the looks of its host.
Rationale - The rationalization hamster's job is (simply) to force cognitive dissonance and delusion in its host. If the host is particularly attractive, the rationalization hamster does not have to work that hard. If the host is not particularly attractive, the rationalization hamster has to work overtime to achieve its mandates.
Premises - The rationalization hamster is a psychological entity that cannot tire nor die. It is a limitless energy source. The rationalization hamster will not stop nor relent until it achieves it's objective.
I swear, after reading the article I'm thinking instead of an "Enjoy the Decline" how-to-book, I would make a ton more money writing "Captain Capitalism's Harlequin Romance Novels."
"I looked at her...my beautiful economics professor. Oh sure, she was 47, and sure, she had 4 children and two ex-husbands, and sure the other 23 year old trust fund baby men in my class wouldn't find her attractive...but I loved her for her intelligence. Her unwillingness to conform and teach us economics as told by the establishment. No, she rebelled. She taught us Marx. She taught us Keynes. She showed me what true beauty was, and was meant to be. She was my liberator. She liberated me from the evil thinking that was foisted upon me by my evil multi-billion-dollar father. I didn't have to work. But I didn't care. I was burning for her, I needed to hear her intelligent words and see her exude independence.
I swore to myself, once I earned my A in class through intelligence and parroting, I would drive up in my 2011 Mercedes Series 7 and propose to my economics and romance professor and abscond with my father's trust fund and we could live on the beaches of Gao and burn incense and make candles and eat organic grass shoots, and write environmentalist poetry.
And we'd get cats."
No comments:
Post a Comment