How the Youth Shot Itself In the Foot

I love short pieces like this.

But i LOOOOOVE it even more when English majors get hit upside the head.

I can see it now. An advertisement for majoring in English.

"Hey kids! Tired of trying and having to do all that stupid math?

Want something that is easy to major in and won't require one single calorie of energy to "earn" your degree in?

Or do you just plain want to admit right up front and announce to the world "hey, I'm too lazy to do any real work and want rest of you to take care of me, but I want to still feel like I'm doing something so I can claim I'm independent and trick myself into not feeling bad about my parasitic existence?"

Then major in ENGLISH!

Yes, English is the language you're all familiar with because, well, it's the freaking national language and you've been speaking it since you were 2.

We don't know why universities offer program, let alone graduate programs in the language, but if you plain have no temerity or work ethic in you, piss away 4, 6 or 8 years of your life (and your, your parents' and the taxpayers' money) studying ENGLISH!

Benefits include;

• Looking for work
• Learning nothing new but socialist and communist philosophy posing as an English degree
• How to indoctrinate children so they too can become the future English majors of America
• Working for a non-profit or the public sector in some make-work job so you can feel good about yourself
• Asking yourself at the age of 23 why you can't find a job
• Voting democrat/socialist your entire life so other people's money can be confiscated to make a job for you
  

Don't be one of those "squares" majoring in electrical engineering or computer science who invariably produce everything in the economy and support themselves. And certainly don't become a tradesman with all their "stupid" ability to "fix cars" and "build houses" and "repair plumbing."

No, become the pinnacle of economic deadweight!

MAJOR IN ENGLISH!!!"

Enjoy the decline, kiddies! You've earned it!