Sunday, October 3, 2010

Intestinal Cancer for Warrior?

Warrior - Serving fourteen years for kidnapping and aggravated assault. Half Hispanic and Scottish-Irish with family still in Mexico. Brought up by a family steeped in drug commerce. He writes some of the best prison-fight stories on the Internet.

I’m having serious medical issues and the staff at Medical are dragging their feet. I’ve fallen over a few times due to severe pain, but the staff do not seem to want to figure out what’s wrong with me. First, my stomach burned when I ate, then I developed a chemical taste in my mouth, now I’m feeling pain in my spine, chest and kidneys. I have a bad feeling.

A year ago, I had a dream. A gentleman came to visit me to tell me I had developed cancer. The horrible news woke me up. No one in here wants to say the “C” word for fear of catching it alone. I dismissed the dream, but shortly afterwards some symptoms began. I believed I had every facet of my life together, ready to be successful once I was released from here. I had my body and mind in order, but had neglected the spiritual side of things. I believe the gentleman in my dream was an angel come to warn me, and I am on borrowed time right now.

I wake up at 3am every morning as though I need to savor each moment of each day. If I die in here, I don’t want it to be in vain. I’ve endured 10 years, and worked hard to reclaim my life. How ironic to be seriously ill two years from going home.

So now I wait for confirmation from Medical. I will write more about the whole Medical ordeal, but I feel I have intestinal cancer. I don’t think I can finish my last blog story, “Standing Up.” I feel I need to write something more positive.

The last time I went to Medical, I got into an argument with the staff. They kept telling me nothing was wrong. Well, I don’t think they live in my body and feel my pain. I told them they should be ashamed of themselves for their indifference. It doesn’t seem fair of them to deny that I am sick, and to only be ready to intervene when extreme suffering occurs. They told me that I am crazy. They find it OK to allow people to get sick and die due to medical neglect. They ease their consciences with the thought, “You shouldn’t have come to prison. It’s all your fault.” To me, that is crazy!

Right now, I am in pain. My family and friends are getting involved, but I can use all of the help I can get. I’ll be damned if I let them get way with indirectly contributing to my death.

Promise me, Shaun, no matter what happens to me, you’ll live a good life, one for me and all of the lives prison has destroyed. Don’t be seduced by fame, and don’t neglect your spirit. I feel your success coming on, but you must remain grounded. If you don’t, you’ll fall, and I don’t want that. We are meant to help each other, to live in hope, faith and love, to lift each other up, and guide one another the right way. We can’t live in selfishness, bitterness, anger, ignorance, and lack of effort for what is good. We are meant to love each other, create peace, and have compassion.

Shaun, you’ve become a friend and a brother to me. I’m proud of you. I have your name written in my heart, bro. I keep you in my daily prayers, and love you. You are going to do great things. I really need you to pray for me, and your blog readers too.

I’m not afraid to admit that reading this letter from Warrior brought tears to my eyes. He has so much faith in me, yet I feel so helpless as to what to do for him. The strategy of the medical staff is to deny serious conditions exist so they can absolve themselves from having to perform costly treatments and surgeries. It’s all about money. They assign little value to the lives of prisoners. As soon as they diagnose a problem they legally have to provide treatment as prisoners have the right to medical care. On top of the recent death of Two Tonys, this is a big shock to me. I pray that Warrior’s youth and resolve pull him through.

Links to more prison stories by Warrior:
Warrior v Big E.
Rapist on the Yard
Bucket of Blood
Central Unit

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