How to Stimulate the Economy #324

Much of the solution to get the US economy growing again involves destroying bottlenecks that keep or hold back production.

For example if we were allowed to get rid of children that disrupt class and thereby lessen the quality of education for the remaining 80%, imagine what levels of learning those kids could learn?

Instead of having "commuter lanes" that nobody uses or light rail systems that benefit the minority, why not build 12 lane highways so people can not only get to work on time, but spend more time with family, less time on the road, and if you are a true environmentalist, burn less fossil fuels as they zip quickly along.

We could even shoot the majority of bankers and mortgage brokers that caused the economic crisis we're in. Imagine a functional and accurate financial system that assesses risk and return precisely and allocates resources accordingly (not to mention the additional honesty we'd receive from bankers as "The Great Banker Purge of 2009" is fresh in their memories).

But of all the many bottlenecks we could destroy there is one that would cause immense economic growth;

The grocery store lane.

You see right now in Minnesota you get a 50/50 chance of having a self-check out lane at most grocery stores. Those 50% WITHOUT self-check out lanes are the culprits in holding back our economic recovery. Yes, I, along with many-a-bachelor have availed ourselves of this great time saving device. We save the grocery store money in that they needn't hire labor to check us out. And with the time saved, it gives us all that much more time to contribute to GDP and lead this nation out of recession.

But oh, there are those grocery stores that insist on holding us hostage, waiting behind Tilly and her $173.45 worth of groceries, keeping us from our heroic economic calling of contributing to GDP. Oh no, we're not allowed out of the slow grocery store lane. No, we have to suffer looking over worthless rags/magazines about Julia Roberts and Brad Pitt interspersed between the trashy romance novels. Only to be condemned to a lengthier sentence as Tilly pulls out her coupons.

Yes, Tilly saved $1.02.

But it cost the economy $3,506 in lost labor and production.

Ergo, when I am king, I shall mandate that all stores have self-check out lines so that the movers and shakers and true GDP-producers may pay for their wares, get out of the store and get on with their lives, while Tilly and her coupon cutters can hold each other up.