I Hate Nepotists

Bragging set aside, the fact was that I graduated in the top 5 of my class.

Not top 5 percent.

Top 5 people. I was number 5.

And the reason I knew I was #5 was because it was the Carlson School and it was reasonably competitive. You could ID the people who kept posting good grades, knew their stuff in class and ergo were your "competition." Not that you didn't like them, you just knew who they were.

But there was one thing that I would like to (once again, setting bragging aside and merely pointing out the facts) point out that separated me from the rest and that was out of the 5 I was the only one to;

1. Pay for all of my college AND living expenses in its entirety with no debt
2. Work full time while going to school full time
3. Graduate 6 months early

The rest of them either had college at minimum heavily subsidized and not a one of the remaining 4 finished in anything less than 5 years and I doubt any of them worked beyond a token 15 hours a week.

Regardless, in my young 21 years of youth I thought, foolishly, that with this background I would be reasonably attractive to potential employers. That upon graduation, the least of my worries would be finding a job.

Ah, but there was one minor little factor I forgot to consider;

Nepotism and cronyism.

For up until that point I thought the Ambercrombie and Fitch wearing students who would say,

"It's not what you know, it's who you know"

were merely jocks who couldn't go pro and now were relegated to majoring in marketing or sales. Guys (and gals) who didn't have the ability to do calculus or math and therefore thought they'd get by in corporate America by kissing ass and brown-nosing. Foolish peers who were guaranteed to be in for a rude awakening when they got to the "real world" where obviously corporations would be able to weed them out, because SURELY corporate America appreciates production and efficiency and smarts over brown-nosing.

Sadly, they knew more than I ever did about business, no matter what my rank. For they were right, it's not what you know. It is who you know. All I knew was how to predict stock market bubbles and housing bubbles and Asian currency crises. All nothing compared to a good gopher and ass-kisser whose dad golfs with the VP of finance.

And so for the next year I watched my career go down in utter flames as I saw people with C averages landing $50,000 a year jobs at their "dad's firm" or suburban Sue getting a coveted analyst position at her "grandpa's firm." Even to this day when I teach class, I see college students all of 19 years old, pull up in a brand new Honda and have absolutely no worries about finding a job later in life because one is lined up for them. And if not, no worries, you can always go back and live with mommy and daddy back in the burbs.

The reason this is so angering is not that I personally didn't get the coveted analyst position at the local investment bank when I was 23, but that it is not a meritocracy. That the best people do not get the job. That the highest qualified do not get the promotion. It is the connected or the charlatans that do. And you can study your ass off and pioneer new lines of thought or come up with radical and crazy ways of doing things that could make a company millions, but if you're not somebody's nephew or somebody's niece, well, "Thank you for your interest in XYZ Corporation. Though you background is impressive we have decided to go with another candidate who's willing to suck our...ahem."

My whole point, is that while I am the most ardent capitalist and for everybody making billions in dough, the opportunity cost we suffer by letting the less-qualified candidates get positions of power or productivity costs us all. Imagine, for once, if all senators and congressmen who had college paid for, sudden disappeared and were replaced with people who did. Imagine if the ass-kissing CEO's of all the financial firms who more or less wiped out 25% of the equity in your homes were replaced instead with farmer Joe. The amount of pain we could have avoided (not to mention the sheer level of production we would have enjoyed) is unfathomable.

That being, though I am for lower taxes, when I see charts like this;




I start to wonder how much of that was truly earned by people who busted their asses off and created something new and something of worth, or were merely the Bush, Heinz-Kerry's, Pelosi's, Obama's, and Gore's of the world who never worked a day in their lives, never got their fingernails dirty and never shoveled sh!t for a living (which coincidentally was my first job - poo-shoveler). And then I start to opine about a "nepotism" tax where we tax people who get jobs over more-qualified people because of who their mommy is or something.

Learn About Detroit from Dr. Perry

Two interesting posts

Here

and

here.

Behind the Housing Crash - Slated for August 2008

Hi All,

To whet your appetites I figured I'd put the book cover up there since that is done so you can at least get a feel to see what it looks like. Looking at an August release date assuming all goes well converting the manuscript into an actual book.

We Want to Become Socialist

I'll try to make this quick and succinct as possible, but it is a thought or an epiphany I just had, so bear with me if it isn't too clear.

I listen to talk radio obviously and as of recent the tone of various talk show hosts, be they Rush Limbaugh, Jason Lewis, Mark Levine, and Michael Savage, etc., is one of frustration, almost defeatism or hopelessness. They see the likes of Nancy Pelosi do nothing short of lie to the face of the American people and blame high gas prices on the Republicans and Bush, while at the same time blocking any legislation that would lift the ban on drilling in ANWR or offshore, and worse still the American people believe her. They see the likes of Californian coo-koos passing legislation to ban fast food restaurants with goes against every bit of freedom and choice that is a founding principle of America. They see Bush sign the subprime slime deadbeat bank bailout which abandons any sense of responsibility. And probably the most depressing thing of all is Barack Obama, who literally stands for nothing, is most likely going to be our next (and first socialist) president.

And what I'd like to try to point out to them, and for those of you who are also frustrated with this, is that we seem to forget that this is ultimately a democracy. While we listen to talk radio, and we have empirical proof capitalism works, and we have history on our side and know, NOT "feel", but KNOW we are right, we have to understand that too high a percentage of Americans do not think this way. A critical mass (arguably the majority) of Americans no longer believe in freedom, self-reliance, capitalism, profit, manliness, competition, "nuclear" families, and everything else that is quintessentially American.

A perfect example happened right here in Minnesota. At one of our theme parks a group of teenage punks copped a feel of a 12 year old girl, which then sent her father into a rage, which then begat an unfair fight where these 8 punks then proceeded to beat him so severely he was sent to the hospital.

Now if it was 1945, people would have intervened and kicked the crap out of the 8 punks and given no thought to law suits or liability. But instead, people just sat there and watched and did nothing. Not because they didn't want to. Not because they didn't want to do the right thing. Not because they didn't want to do the American thing. But because a bunch of socialist lawyers have made it too risky to intervene and thus society, and Americanism, suffers.

Regardless, my whole point is that instead of banging our heads against the wall, and yelling pointlessly into the wind, we may have to admit that this is still a democracy for better or worse, and if the people want socialism, then the people will get socialism.

I like it no more than you. And I'm not saying that you still don't fight the good fight. But we have to realize that we can apply all the logic and empirical evidence we want to help support our case, but it will fall on deaf ears as socialism is not founded in reality. That's the only way socialism can work. That you convince enough sheeple they don't have to work to eat. They're poor not because they produce nothing, but because they are from disadvantaged group "x." Or some preppy Amercrombie and Fitch Harvard elitist fools people that he will bring them "hope and change" and everything will be chocolates and kittens thereafter.

People don't choose socialism because they think it will work, they choose it because they want it to work. And that, unfortunately my friends, is what the majority of what I will call "Pseudo-Americans" want today.

World's Largest Arms Exporters

About what I expected.

Added a Mug

Per a couple people's request I have added a mug to the Cafe Press site.

That being said, if what they say is true and Cafe Press is charging a $5 "economy" fee, I will be looking for alternatives to Cafe Press.

The Captain's Pad O' Commerce

So I spend the better part of 7 months writing the book (due out in 3 weeks, please be patient) and it's kind of weird in that you are working, working, working and then all of the sudden, BOOM!

Nothingness.

You wake up and your schedule is completely open. No writing, no editing, no chart-making. Nothing.

And it takes a little bit to adapt to. Reminds me a lot of college where I worked full time and went to school full time, but since my job was a college job, once I graduated, I couldn't have my college job anymore. Went from about 90 hours per week to 0 in one day.

Regardless, economists of the capitalist type get ancy laying around all day because the never ending urge to produce GDP calls. Relentlessly it calls, "Yoooouuuu must contribute to GDP!!! You must produce something of worth!!!!! You must create wealth and advance society."

So while I sit here and wait for the publisher to put the finishing touches on the book, I decided to embark on a little side project and put together those shirts I was always talking about;

The "I Contribute to GDP" shirts!

In any case, click here on this link to go to the Captain's Pad O' Commerce and if you are so inclined buy yourself one of these sharp shirts (and in part helping contribute to GDP yourself!) Also feel free to forward the link to anybody else that might be interested. Out of pure intellectual curiosity, I’d be interested to see just how far this thing might get forwarded… plus, now wouldn’t that be sweet if I became a millionaire over something like a shirt?

Regardless, there are two options; the text on the front of the shirt and the text on the back. I don't know why the text on the back shirt is more expensive than the front one, but I created both in case you are really adamant about having it on the back. And should you buy one, I promise all funds will go to the Captain's "Spending All My Money On Me Fund."

Does a more noble capitalistic cause exist?

Empirical Proof Why America is No Longer a Meritocracy and Why We Should Shoot the Lobbyists

Do you see what I see?

A Zimbabwean Economist

I found this picture hilarious from The Economist.


Don't know who he is, but you know he's at least an aspiring junior deputy economist.

And while we're on the topic, the highest denominated bills in the history of the world;

It still amazes me to this day as to how many adults do not understand why you just "can't print off more money." What a lot of people don't know, freemarketers and libertarians as well, is that if you can explain to people why you can't just "print off more money" you've already sent that soul on the road to become a capitalist.

Captain Capitalism and His Adventures in Snake Mountain!

Again, for effect, please click here first.

It was another one of those trips where I had set forth out to find various fossils (which I did - large clams from 500 ft above the river)



geologic formations and perhaps get a little mountain climbing in yesterday that so defines my obscure hobbies. This time I went to the scenic lake of Lake Pepin, merely a widening of the Mississippi river to the south and where on either side, Wisconsin or Minnesotan, there are cliffs that one can climb.

We had gotten out of a town called Maiden Rock where I saw this cliff or as I would come to refer to it as, Snake Mountain.


I didn't get more than 6 feet up before I heard a rather distinct and unique rattling. And in 2 seconds it dawned on me there was a rattlesnake very close.

I had always wanted to see a rattlesnake. On my many adventures into the Badlands, Black Hills, Wyoming and Nebraska I had hoped I would see one. But they're kind of like tornadoes. You'd like to see them, but not 12 inches away from you. And there he was; big, fat, coiled rattlesnake now sharing the same narrow ledge with me. I decided to call him "Pookey."

Much in an Indiana Jones way falling into the pit in Egypt with the cobra in front of him, I slowly slinked away doing my best not to disturb Pookey. I got back down the first ledge we had gone up, and thought, "boy, I've been waiting all this time to see a rattlesnake and I never got a picture. I should go back up, but a different way, with the camera to get a better picture than what we were getting from below."



So I went back up (but on a different route) with the camera and as I was getting on top of the ledge over Pookey, it occurred to me they may have a snake nest in the area. So I grabbed a stick and started batting away at my path that I would inevitably take to get a better picture of Pookey.

All was well, I managed to get directly above Pookey and then I heard a slithering noise. Sure enough all of 5 inches from where I walked was Pookey's bigger, fatter brother who opted not to rattle and let me know of his existence, slowing slithering away. His name was Philbert. I thought Philbert at first may be a normal non-deadly snake, but then he too started rattling.


It was at this point I determined my best option would be to get off Snake Mountain as quickly as possible. And now furiously batting away at a new route down the ledge to ensure there were no more snakes, I managed to get off the ledge without getting bitten or greeted by a third snake.

This has nothing to do with economics, but like the Clark award or something, there should be an award given to the most adventuresome economists under 40 who do the most to deconstruct the stereotype economists sit and tinker with numbers all day.

I'm Sure It's Just a Coinky Dink

But Obama is a socialist afterall, and bar the Hitler posters, I would say there are similarities in not only the posters, but the ideologies as well.

Does anybody hate Che as much as me while we're on the topic? How somebody who was a murderer and basically a deadbeat loser could attain such cult status from people who really don't know about the man but fall in love with his "rebel" like status? I mean Captain Jack Sparrow, now he was a rebel. Han Solo, he was a rebel. Ronald Reagan, he was a rebel. And rebels that fought for good and brought about a reduction in poverty only Che and his economically impotent socialist counterparts could only dream on.

Perhaps it shows the intellect of Obama supporters as there's a persistent occurrence of Che images in his campaign; they don't know what he stands for, just that he's "hot" and a glamorous "rebel." Young foolish puppy-love with no maturity, wisdom or adulthood going into their decision to choose who will be the leader of the free world...or at least the free world for now.

Another Reason AlQaeda is Failing

Presumably the goal of childish little men running around the desert subscribing to a literalist interpretation of an archaic scribe to make themselves feel important was to bring down the mighty west, particularly, America. And while they did manage to kill 3,000 people in two fell swoops, the overall results are, frankly, not in their favor.

For while they had an immediate and initial success, over the next few years, all they managed to do was kill their fellow countrymen in a spate of suicide bombings.



I do not wish to hear from the BAF (blame America first crowd) because if 9-11 never happened, I doubt we would have gone into Iraq, but I do wish to point out that basically Al Qaeda has more or less caused the opposite effect they were intending because, well frankly, they're disgusting evil people that nobody, even Muslims in the Mideast, don't like. And particularly so, since it's primarily been Muslims in the Mideast getting killed by all the terrorist attacks, and three times as many as in America.

If anything, this is a call for moderate Muslims to start fighting back and cause a reformation within the Islamic faith. I have no skin in the game one way or another as I largely detest all religions, but if you're going to go and get yourselves killed over something, you might want to purge from your ranks the radical nutjobs blowing up your fellow countrymen in the process.

I would also like to point out that, despite what brainwashed, non-thinking liberals would say, these charts are empirical proof of George Bush's success and why history will treat him kindly. Even I don't like GW that much, but you cannot deny (though some will concoct conspiracy theories as to why they might) George Bush has succeeded on the war on terror.

How American's View Business

Everyone is entitled to everything, and if they don't get what they want, they go running to the government;

The US is Slowly Turning into Europe

There is Europe and then there is the US. The whole idea was that they were two distinctly different "cultures;" The US being the tough, rugged, individualistic, don't give me your freaking charity General Patton types who pull themselves out of poverty with sheer hard work and ingenuity. And Europe being more of the caring, compassionate type, who is willing to lend a hand (other people's hands, matter of fact) and institute a more socialist society. Not that they are rivals or enemies, but in the grand scheme of things, two neighbors with differing political views, that still like each other none the less and can get along. Additionally, having the option allows for true diversity and if the more entrepreneurial wanted to leave Europe to chase their dreams in the US, or those in the US wanted a cushy government job and never really wanted to build an empire, but just live a decent life in Europe, so be it.

But the two are merging and becoming more homogeneous than we think;


Even under George Bush, dictator, tyrant, puppy killer and one who talks in the theater, the trend in the US has been to increase spending. I know we all like to point to his tax cuts, but they're not real tax cuts as they haven't been accompanied by cuts in spending. This is merely postponing taxes into the future as all government spending must be paid for with taxes. Either today, or tomorrow, they must be paid. Ergo, spending is the real measure.

But Europe as well has been trending towards America, cutting their spending and abandoning their more socialist aims.

The result?

We (the west I mean) will all become boringly the same. The French will be less French. Americans will be less American, and therefore less warranted to pick on the French because we'll be more like them. And worse still there will be no more real "America." It will be socialism lite under Barack Obama and Nancy Pelosi. And, despite what lefter leaning types will claim, we will lose the one thing that has made America different and better than Europe and made us once the beacon for the massive emigration out of the old continent and the envy of the world; economic freedom.

You can come here, but you're going to face 40% tax rates.

You can build a company here, but we're going to tax your corporation first at 40% and then you at another 40%.

You can live here, but you're going to have to pay for all of our retired population who so poorly planned for their retirement, that they'll need another $10 trillion in subsidies to pay for their medical care.

Sadly, the US will become another European nation, not unique, not special and definitely not American. And the only countries that will be "American" will be the various smaller nations such as Bermuda, Switzerland, the Caymans and Hong Kong, and China which is trending rapidly to an old school style America.

War on Terror Almost Costing as Much as Sub Prime Dead Beats

$860 billion.

Almost as much as all the sub prime slime has cost us, but at least you can say with the Iraq war it was for a good cause.

Warning - All knee jerk pacifist rhetoric will be summarily ignored as we've heard your side for the past 8 years and I'm sure nothing new will be said.

Empirical Economic Proof Why the War on Drugs Has Failed

I can make no simpler nor convincing of an argument for the legalization of drugs that this;

Do You See What I See?

OK, let's see if you can tell where the REAL problem lies.



Is Ms. White's problem the big bad republicans and George Bush forced this horrible housing market upon her or....(fill in the blank)"_____________________________."

A Week of Oil Charts #5 - "The US Doesn't Have Enough Oil to Make a Difference"

B as in B

S as in S.

The US has lots of oil. Enough to fuel 65 million cars for 60 years arguably.


But we'll never know because the likes of Nancy Pelosi and her socialist brigade of democrats insist you me, poor people and rich all pay more for gas because it would ruin her pompous constituents' view of San Francisco Bay...errr...I mean "it's bad for the environment."

Never have American's handicapped themselves and retarded their progress for such stupid reasons.

McCain vs. Obama - Money Raised

I love it when I'm told the Republicans/Conservatives in this country have all the money.


If you think for a second Obama is some innocent, poor farm boy from Illinois with no connections and therefore no strings attached, you are a fool.

The Democrats Take Over the Fed

Like the judicial system, the democrats are attempting to take what should be unbiased, apolitical institutions and turn them into political footballs, namely the Federal Reserve. Having things such as an unbiased judicial system, not to mention central bank, is vital if you desire to have any semblance of an operating country. Alas nothing is sacred to the socialists in this country.

Of course, many thanks to the MSM to bringing this to our attention, NOT!

How Much of the Mortgage Market Does Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac Account For?

A neato chart by the NYT. Even though they are communists, scratching their heads why their ad revenues are plummeting, I will give a hat tip to them for this splendid and fine chart;


ht to housing.com

A Week of Oil Charts #4 - You are Big Oil

Presumably according to leftist religion (I've decided to call it a religion because socialism cannot be proven to work and it's largely based on faith and hope and self-appointed leaders asking you to give them your money), "big oil" would be owned by a few ultra rich elitists. You know, Bush, Cheney, and Rumsfeld each holding a 33% share with the tie breaking vote going to Hitler (who was resurrected by a secret CIA program to provide Bush guidance - it's true!).

However, that annoying pest to leftist religion known as "truth" paints a different picture.



Apparently we all own big oil. You do, your friends do, your mom does, even your grandpa. If you participate in pretty much any 401k, 403b and 457 plan, it's almost a guarantee you own a piece of big oil. And not just a small piece, a big piece. Matter of fact the whole damn thing.

This is another ramification people who like to bash big oil better start thinking about. If you want to tax them more, then that means their price will go down and you'll be hurting not only yourself, but the millions of other Americans who've invested in them indirectly via their retirement programs. And if you really do care about the elderly who are living on a fixed income, how about you not destroy the value of their underlying investments and leave them be. Additionally, dare I point it out, oil (and other commodity firms) are about the only stocks that have been doing well over the past year. Imagine how much less would be in your retirement account if you didn't invest in big oil.

Of course, this is called "logic" and "thinking things through" which is something the big oil conspiracy theorists cannot do. They can only "link" about one or two levels, a perfect example being corporations moving offshore.

You hate them.

You already tax them at 40%.

And you want to tax them more.

You demand they pay for everything.

And then you act surprised that they move offshore to Abu Dhabi or the Caymans or Ireland.

It's like beating your wife and being surprised she leaves you.

Alas, they cannot link the two together and therefore not only are corporations bad for making a profit (be they oil firms or otherwise) they're doubly bad for having the gall to move to a more business friendly environment.

Regardless, it's these kind of things, where there is a lapse or an inability to link the consequence with the action that triggered it, where I often opt not to debate socialists as it's pointless.

Al Qaeda and Taliban Deaths vs. US/UK/Allied Deaths

I've spent the last hour trying to find some kind of official figure. Does any junior deputy military economist happen to have these figures or know where I could find them?

The Banking Industry Needs Ronald Speirs

The parallels between this and the banking industry is unreal.

I wish it would be just as simple as going to the likes of Wachovia, UBS, Indy Mac, and the bevy of other blood letting banks out there and tell them, "I'm taking over."

A Week of Oil Charts #3 - How Big is Big Oil

"Big oil" is english for "I'm a freaking idiot."

When people use the phrase "big oil" and are referring to the likes of Exxon and BP, you can know, with immediacy that person doesn't know what they're talking about. And the reason, despite these corporations being multi-billion dollar firms, is that they're not really that big.

Not that big compared to the rest of the economy;

(I'd love to see I Pod profits to oil profits)

And not that big compared to the REAL big oil; nationalized oil firms in the Mideast.


Ergo, I think we should start a campaign to revoke the voting rights of people who use the term "big oil."

The Starbucks Solution

Starbucks is closing 600 stores and so their customers are signing petitions now to keep them open.

1. Anybody want to point out the OBVIOUS freaking solution to this problem then?
2. This speaks volumes of the mentality of (predominantly) liberal thinking of the clientele that goes to Starbucks. The solution lays in protesting, not a free-market solution like BUYING MORE FREAKING COFFEE!!!!
3. The tone these people have as if this is some kind of major trauma or problem. There are times I wish we had another Great Depression to put these idiots' minds in perspective.
4. HOW MUCH TIME ON YOUR HANDS DO YOU HAVE AND HOW KITCHY-KOO IS YOUR LIFE YOU CALL UP STARBUCKS BECAUSE THEY CLOSED A BRANCH??? I just want to see their daily planners and one day in those planners;

9AM - Wake up
10AM - Go to Starbucks and talk to other locals who have a lifestyle that allows us to go to Starbucks and not have a real job like the people in "Friends."
11AM - Shop at the local whole/organic foods market.
Noon - Afternoon Starbucks serving as a pre-game show to "The View."
1PM - Watch "The View" and then go back to Starbucks to discuss with friends how insightful the people on The View are.
3PM - Return home to work on local community initiative to ban smoking in private homes. Then start new initiatives to not only ban smoking, but drinking and thinking and talking.
4PM - Whew, is it 4PM already? I need Starbucks!
5PM - Go home to change for an interpretive dance/play at the local theater put on by the local unemployed actors guild - thank god they serve Starbucks!
8PM - Time for my power-hip-hop-infused-pilates-yoga class!
9PM - Feed the cats
10PM - Decaf Starbucks!

I can only imagine what John Wayne and George Patton would think of America today.

A Week of Oil Charts #2

A troll once wrote in, "well how do you know that it's the value of the dollar that's affecting the price of oil."

And if you think about that question, it is one of those genuinely stupid questions out-come-based educated kids will ask, thinking there is no such thing as a stupid question. Because the question answers itself.

Yes, the value of the dollar or any currency will affect the price of things, especially if you're importing it. So to, again, advance our basic economic understanding of why gas prices are so high, one of the main reasons is the value of the dollar has dropped, thereby necessitating more dollars to buy that same barrel of oil compared to other currencies;


The interesting thing about this, is in addition to Nancy Pelosi and the democrats continuing to do their best to keep oil prices high, the left is also indirectly to blame for high oil prices in that what they do for careers does not help the value of the dollar.

A Week of Oil Charts #1

I got an outstanding report send to me the other day which does a great job of showing why oil is so overvalued, why it isn't BIG OIL that's been driving up prices and is about the best way I can think of (aside from $4 per gallon gasoline) to convince those (primarily on the left) that it is plain, simple economics driving prices and not some BushCheneyHaliburton Bogey Man.

And I say this with a half conciliatory tone in that I want to in a very Dennis Prager type way to try to convince those otherwise instead of just berating them as "stupid effing liberals." That being said, if these charts don't convince you, then I have no problem berating you, simply because if you can't see this is why oil prices are so high, then you literally, quite LITERALLY are one of two things;

1. A moron
2. An operative who fully knows why gas prices are so high, but will feign otherwise because you have a political agenda and are not only being intellectually dishonest, but a hypocrite as well.

So here's the first chart, which I think some of us are already familiar with, other commodities have been going up as well;


This obviously points out that if you're going to blame "big oil" for manipulating prices, then you might as well blame "big wheat" "big aluminum" and "big copper." Prices of pretty much all commodities have been going up because of increasing demand from other countries around the world growing at a much faster pace than the US.

Again, if you are to be intellectually honest, then you should be just as pissed at big corn or big coal. You would also have to expand your conspiracy theory to make it so Bush and Cheney not only ran oil, but all these other commodities as well.

Awwwww, Poor Babies

This is a photo of oil traders in shock at the precipitous drop in oil prices.



The irony is they're upset because the price of oil DROPPED.

To hell with them.

How Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae Work

This sums it up.

Paid Maternity Leave

80 weeks off the ladies of Sweden get when they have a kid.

That's 560 days. A year and a half you get off from work, WITH PAY, for having a kid.



I'd be curious to see how many of them then spring for day care so they can go about and play for a year and a half and not really raise the kid. Or, since this is Sweden, have the government day care take care of the kid while they take a 16 month vacation.

Anybody from Sweden know if people do that? They get the 1.5 year maternity leave, but then send the kid to day care and loaf around for 16 months?

Oil as a Percent of the Trade Deficit

Another interesting chart from The Economist.



Didn't realize oil was nearly half our trade deficit.

I Said an Alaskan Polar Bear Heater!

So one of my favorite movies is the original Nutty Professor. And probably the best scene is when Buddy Love goes in an orders an Alaskan Polar Bear Heater (which you will click on now).

This guy actually made one and tried it.

I too shall follow in the footsteps of Buddy Love and try one.

Thus concludes your obscure American trivia of the day.

Single Christian Groups

In my elder 20's I was recruited to play some basketball at this league for single Christian men. Only two problems;

1. Not Christian.

2. Kind of your run of the mill Irish/Jewish/American short white guy. I can dribble and pass, but my aim is nothing like Halo 3.

In any case, the presumed goal of the Christian's singles group was (I'm guessing) to meet other single Christian ladies. There was not one girl around, except for the janitor who was not...um...young.

Then I realized it was more of a polite way to get people interested in perhaps joining the church. And I'm inclined to agree. It was through comradery and fun that you would emphasize the positive aspects of Christianity (salvation, forgiveness, free wine on Sundays) and not the fire and brimstone and guilt and no smoochy smooch until married BS that you could recruit some people.

That being said, I think I will join the Church of Mindless Self-Indulgence. They have a better sales pitch.

The bachelor life is actually not too far off from this.

Everything BUT GDP Points to a Recession

Add another tidbit of data pointing to recession, but since it's not GDP, we technically cannot complain it's a recession yet. That being said, I found this chart interesting showing the trend since the 1960's where commodity prices have jumped (as measured by producer prices) a recession usually follows (denoted by those gray bars).



Don't worry, it will happen. Give it time.

Great

Great, just great.

And who, I ask is going to pick up the tab?

Mandatory economics and personal financial management classes in the public schools NOW!

Oh, wait, that would kill the democratic party.

Housing as a Percent of GDP

Had a request asking how much housing accounts for the economy. Well here you go;

"Put Me in Command"

One of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies is Captain Jack Sparrow;

"Put me in command."

And that is more or less what I would like to convey to all the shareholders out there of;

Merrill Lynch
JP Morgan
Citigroup
UBS
Fannie Mae
Freddie Mac
and any other financial firm that is now having to go to the taxpayer with a cup in their hand.

Put me in command. I would do better than any one of their Ivy League educated, blue bloods and for about 1/2 the price...then again, if I was CEO of all firms, 1/2 of the normal pay for all of them would still be billions, but I would guarantee you this new megalopolis of a firm would not lose even 1/2 of a billion.

Ah, but that is unheard of, an outsider not from the East coast heading up these dinosaur of firms now becoming parasites on the US taxpayer. So outlandish of an idea, so radical to put somebody under 40 who is not a grayhaired MBA putz who's more concerned about his commission than the overall health of the firm.

Ah, to hell with it, I'm erroneously assuming it's a meritocracy anyway.

That being said, I would be the Captain Jack Sparrow of the finance world.

Sub Prime Slime

It is known amongst my circles that I am indeed writing a book on the housing crash (and for those interested parties, yes it's off to the publisher). And whenst at parties this usually begets questions of me like;

"How much further does housing have to drop?" - Answer: 10-15%

"Are we in a recession?" - Answer: Not yet

"I hate Bush, he's to blame for all my problems, including the crash." - Answer: Don't worry, I hear Obama will make it all better.

But one of my favorite responses is when inevitably they ask me who to blame, and I say, "sub prime borrowers" the knee jerk "everybody's a winner" reaction is;

"Well the majority of sub prime borrowers still pay their loans on time."

This response is typically based in pity or defense for those who are deemed "sub prime" and ergo are of a lower economic class and therefore deserving of all benefits of the doubts and are above criticism. And while technically true, the majority of the sub prime borrowers do pay back their loans on time, it's not the vast majority.

Based on "vintage" as The Economist refers to it, sub prime borrowers pain the rest of us with default rates anywhere between 20-40%. It is absolutely inexcusable that not only roughly 1 in 4 people default on their loans, but that banks and mortgage lenders were so poor at analyzing the creditworthiness of these borrowers that 30% of their client base is defaulting.



Now the modern day psychology in America is that, by default, these people are victims. Oh, the poor sub prime borrower. Boo hoo, they are in default. They must have come upon hard times. We need to help them.

I, of course, being the evil, right wing fascist who smashes butterflies and doesn't wash after going to the bathroom, am of the more old school American psychology; let them sink. I am also so bold to call these people what they would have been called all of 30 years ago;

Deadbeats.

Give it time, this too will become politically incorrect word you will no longer be able to use.

Why Do You Always Have To Be Right - Martyr Man?

Article From this wonderful website.


Dear Martyr Man,

You will always be the victim, in every situation where someone tries to get close to you. You cannot relate to women as equals. You look for a strong-willed woman, latch on to her, but envy her strength and ability to express herself openly, so you attack her in vicious little ways. Ways so subtle that you can easily and convincingly deny any wrongdoing and make HER look like the crazy one for even suspecting that you are a passive-aggressive game player.

You played similar games with women before, and this was a chief motivator for their anger and "abuse" towards you. If they struck you physically, that was not right, but when you paint yourself as a martyr, you *always* fail to mention the emotional and psychological abuse you were inflicting on THEM.

That's right, Martyr. You are an abuser. You. Poor little cringing, eternally victimized you.

"But abusers scream, yell and hit, and I never do that!" you protest. "I'm not that way at all. I don't have the anger gene. I am completely incapable of anger."

What you are incapable of is the truth. But I am capable of the truth and here it is.

You ARE capable of anger. In fact, you are a very angry person, as your father before you must have also been - he is clearly the one upon whom you have modeled your behavior. Like him, you were too intimidated by other people to express your anger openly, so you nursed your rage in secret and struck out instead in subtle little ways. If you were asked to do something, you made sure you "forgot" repeatedly or did a poor job. You no doubt carry this behavior on in your work and it is the reason most of the other employees don't like you. People tend not to like someone who does not do his share of the work and is sullen and resistant to new ideas. They are probably tired of your constant subterfuge and backstabbing. No doubt you also play the divide-and-conquer game, playing people off against one another.

You haven't said much about your mother, but I'll make a few educated guesses. She was a strong-willed woman who dominated you and your father, and you both resented it, but neither of you ever told her so directly. Neither of you had the courage to assert yourselves openly. So you both "got even" with her by lying, false promises, "forgetting" or otherwise sabotaging things she asked you to do, and/or withholding your attention and love. Your casual remark about what you did with her books after her death was quite breathtaking in its heartlessness.

Your mother was a model for how you view women today. As I have previously said, you go after women with strong, assertive personalities, because they fit your mother's model and because you admire them for the qualities that you yourself lack. However, you also hate them because they are strong and you are weak. Because you cannot assert yourself openly, you play psychological games designed to break them down, subvert their will, and subtly - invisibly - assert YOUR control.

That's right, Martyr Man. You want control. You are not able to control yourself and so you are controlled by others - but you resent it. So you get a feeling of control by manipulating situations with a deft, invisible hand. You "forget" that a woman asked you to do something. You "forget" NOT to do something she finds hurtful or disrespectful.

You remember to do the things YOU enjoy and want to do, and your friends think you're a great guy - the kind of guy who would do anything for his friends! (Of course you would - your reputation depends on maintaining an appearance of kindness and willingness, and anyone who doesn't know you WELL would say what a nice guy you are - you would do anything to maintain that image). But when your partner asks you to do something, you suddenly lose your memory. You wander off and fail to return, leaving her to wonder where the hell you are, getting off on her discomfort and distress. If she does something you REALLY don't like, such as attempt to leave you, you hint around at suicide and disappear, leaving her to agonize for days over your fate. Really, you're off hanging out with your buddies and drinking and having fun, but she doesn't need to know that, does she?

No doubt she has noticed the fact that after your initial, highly romantic and complimentary approach, you do a complete about-face once she's "hooked" - like Jerkily and Hyde. Once she's in a relationship with you, the kind and gentle and loving courtship behavior ceases, and the passive-aggressive battle begins. First, you begin by slowly and subtly creating distance between you - by spending less time with her every day (always her fault, because of something SHE did...) withholding your attention and affection, making sure she gets the message that your friends, your other interests, EVERYTHING else are more important to you than the person you called the love of your life. When she challenges you about this behavior, you deny it, and make her out to be irrational and crazy for even suspecting it. After all, the success of a passive-aggressive campaign depends on secrecy and camouflage.

You lie easily, leaving out little details like a wife you haven't yet legally severed ties to, and children that you almost never see. You haven't got a divorce, and you won't, because even though you hate your wife, you feel chained to her. You are dependent on her. It's a parasitic relationship. No doubt she was angry with you because you provoked her, getting a charge out of her frustration and rage, and taking full opportunity to twist the situation around until you could make yourself out to be the victim. I haven't the faintest doubt you have cheated on her many times and lied to her many times, and that was the real cause of the attack that so wounded you emotionally. You brought it on yourself, but you won't admit that part. She's completely evil, in your little fairy tale, and you are the innocent little lamb, incapable of even the slightest twinge of anger.

Every human being on this planet feels anger. You yourself have expressed anger many times to me, not the least of which was your last letter. Yet, you still cling to this desperate delusion that you are incapable of anger.

That's a lie, Mr. Martyr. One of many.

Lies undermine the trust that is vital to all relationships. But you don't care about that as long as you can feel in control. Even when control comes at the expense of love, and that is sad.

Nobody can get close to you, Martyr Man. You'll let them within a certain distance, but then you are frightened by intimacy and of your will being sublimated to another's because deep down inside you know you are not strong enough to assert your own will openly and directly. No wonder you hate bluntness, straightforwardness, truth. Those things rob you of your defense mechanisms and make you feel naked and helpless. You cannot trust another person. Instead, you use passive-aggressive techniques to distance yourself from others and gain control over them. You wither under direct confrontation, but when you are able to operate undetected, you are a cruel and effective bully.

Games You Play:


1. The forgetting game:

You are asked to do something you don't want to do. Instead of saying no, you either "forget" about it or sabotage it so badly that the results are useless. You enjoy the frustration this causes others - this is your sneaky way of asserting yourself and controlling the situation from behind the scenes.

2. The withholding game:

Once in a relationship with someone, you begin to selectively withhold your time and affection. The other person senses this pulling away and asks about it. You deny it. But you let them know, indirectly, that many other things are more important to you than they are - your friends, your work, your opera DVDs. You let them know this by leaving their company to pursue these interests without telling them you are doing so. You enjoy the feeling of being in control, knowing you have falsely promised someone your attention later in the evening and knowing you have no intention of fulfilling that promise. You will "forget" to come back, and enjoy your evening alone knowing you are ruining someone else's. When the person confronts you about this treatment, you will act put out at the suggestion that your actions should live up to your words. You just can't remember to keep your promises! But you always remember the score you needed to finish, the DVD you needed to watch, the book you needed to read, the friends who needed your help. You know full well that this will have the effect of making your partner feel small and insignificant, and that's just the way you like your partner to feel - that way she will be more dependent on you, desperate for your attention, and under your control.

3. The lying game:

Lies roll smoothly off your tongue whenever you are confronted about your behavior and/or something you failed to mention about your past, such as being currently married and the father of two children (now that is a big thing to "forget", even if you alienated them so badly that they don't want to spend any time with you any more). Lying by omission is lying, pure and simple. But you didn't lie on purpose, you claim. No, you just forgot, or your emotional pain was so great that you just couldn't bear to tell the truth!

4. The deflecting game:

Partner becoming suspicious of your lies? No matter, just deflect the attention! Change the subject, wander off, or start ruthlessly (and falsely) putting yourself down so that she won't have the heart to be "mean" enough to pursue the matter any further. If she persists, then you play:

5. The martyr game:

This is your favorite game of all. This game allows you to escape responsibility for anything and everything by invoking your status as the most misunderstood, mistreated, helpless and victimized martyr who ever walked the earth. Nobody understands you or your pain! Don't they see that being a victim completely justifies the way you turn around and become a victimizer at will? Nobody could ever suspect poor little abused, tormented you of torpedoing relationships.

Nobody could expect such an innocent little lamb of deliberately causing emotional and psychological damage to others. Why, look at the way he cries and curls up into a helpless little ball when confronted (and when the lying and deflecting games don't work)! He could never harm ANYONE. He's so broken up over all the deaths in his family, even though they occurred YEARS ago and EVERYONE has to deal with death at some point in their lives. Broken up over the death of his friend, so much that he can't be held responsible for any of his lying, manipulative behavior. Because no one else ever suffered the way he has suffered. The Martyr has no pity or compassion for anyone else, since he saves it all for himself.

6. The superior game:

Unlike all the other people on Earth, you're incapable of anger. You're a regular Gandhi, full of kindness and respect for all, and it's such a tragedy that other people feel the need to get angry at you. You'd never push someone's buttons until they responded in anger and then deny any wrongdoing, setting them up to look like the emotional, crazy one. You'd never get satisfaction out of a nasty little game like that, because you're too superior. You're also superior to the rest of the world culturally - nobody is as sensitive and artistic as you, and nobody appreciates your kind of music, or appreciates it at such a lofty level. You especially love to pull this routine after you've seriously pissed somebody off. You respond with calm politeness - calm of course, since you have got the angry/upset reaction you were aiming for - and double-whammy the person by showing them how YOU never get angry because you are too superior a person to be capable of anger. If someone shows any personality trait that could be considered a flaw, you pull this same routine and let them know that YOU are incapable of such personality flaws, because YOU are so much better than they are.

No wonder you're so angry at being unmasked publicly. Your games depend on your victim not knowing what's going on.

You are not interested in confronting your problems or getting any help for them. You'd rather just float through life like a spineless jellyfish, stinging anyone who ventures too near. Your behavior patterns are firmly entrenched and you are too old to change.

I have no doubt you will continue this behavior pattern with the next woman you meet, and you will continue it until you drive her away, too. You like to drive women away - like to get them so fed up that they leave. That feeds your sickness in a number of ways:

it takes the burden of decision-making off of YOU;

* it enables you to play the martyr over being left by this cruel, horrible woman;
* it gets you sympathy from your next prospect.

You like hurting other people and you have no intention of changing. And that's why I left you.

And don't bother with the "I'm a wonderful sensitive human being who would never cause anyone harm; you've misunderstood me". Oh no. I have not. I have understood you at last.

I understand now how you messed with my mind and made me even fear for my own sanity, how you exploited me emotionally, how you hurt me to the point where I actually felt suicidal. I notice the neat sidestepping from any responsibility by you, how you discredit my (real) pain as a fake attempt to manipulate you. No wonder you would think this. It's called PROJECTION. It's what YOU would do in such a situation, so you project your own screwed up motives onto others.

For someone who is so wounded, so sensitive, so compassionate, so victimized, so gentle - your letters bristle with anger, threats, and nastiness. I thought you were incapable of such things, Gandhi. And you sure are lacking in any compassion at all for the women you've tormented - you have none for your wife and you have none for me. And no doubt you'll have none for your next victim.

You chose your life, and you choose to be this way. You choose it every day. You could change, and learn to be a person of truth, strength and integrity, but you choose not to. It's easier to sit in your shit and cry about how you are victimized while you are busy victimizing others. This is the life you've chosen. You have chosen to be unhappy, and to inflict unhappiness on others.

And *I* have chosen to kick your ass to the curb. Goodbye, Martyr Man, and good riddance.



Sincerely,

Melinda H.

Keep the Bad News Coming

For all you middle age, corrupt, scum bucket bankers out there who put your precious little commission ahead of the solvency of the banks you worked at, I have one thing to say;

Keep it coming.

The more collapses and crises, the better it is for the book and the easier it will be for the younger generation to usurp power from your corrupt asses.

I'm Not a Big PETA Guy

But I feel bad for the bunny.

Herman, my feral backyard, bachelor bunny, sends his sympathy.

You should too. Send Snarks your well wishes.

More On Cold-Hearted Cyberpath: "Gareth" *Updated*

'Gareth's' victim sent us some chat transcripts and snippets about him which we are including here. If you meet this person online - run like heck. Our comments, as always, are in orange - Fighter





Gareth playing Around With A Male Friend (As I Was Told) Or Does He Have Bisexual Tendancies?









Original Article



CHAT

GARETH; dunno whether its worth getting tickets to the big gay out

VICTIM: big gay out?

GARETH; http://www.biggayout.com
lots of gay people but baby shambles, bananarama, friankie goest o holly wood, human league,, electric six and loads more are playing (now why would he just DROP that into a chat with someone he 'loves' if not for the SHOCK VALUE? Sometimes cyberpaths drop hints about their true nature. Bisexual maybe?)

VICTIM: ahh do ya wanna go then? Just to see the bands play?

GARETH: dunno loads of half naked guys i wont be looking but you might (baiting her)

VICTIM: umm i wouldnt be looking at all!!!! besides they are gay!

GARETH: but youd end up staring at muscley half naked blokes

VICTIM:: Got my own sexy man thank you!

GARETH : Where?

VICTIM: hes talking to me on ichat right now duh... YOU! hehe

GARETH: exactly (dummy)

GARETH: theres alot of gay bands too i only want to see 4 or 5 of em.

VICTIM: wanna do that as "we" not "i"? lol you trying to tell me something babe?

GARETH: same thing (no it's not - his victim got it right. The use of "I" is telling and narcissistic)

VICTIM: Okies

GARETH: yes i mean we, but i meant "I hope I goto one of them oneday"

VICTIM: we can travel if you want, stay overnight id love to go see bands
yeah theres no reason you wont be able to go, just because I have the children.

GARETH: i know we'll see maybe next year (he's thinking about one person: GARETH!)

CHAT

VICTIM: You there?

GARETH: yea sorry window doesnt flash to tell me I have a new message. its a pain
eveythings ok, gunna finish off packing in a min nearly done (he was probably talking to someone else or watching porn)

VICTIM: sorry just didnt want you to think i was buggin ya, yeah this ichat is a pain in the ass, just checking you had a rest today cause its a hot day and stuff.

GARETH: so what are you upto? (changes the subject quickly!)

VICTIM: Not much just watching a vid, you?

GARETH: Packing still, you chatting to anyone else? (PROJECTION! and baiting!)

VICTIM: no , only you

CHAT

VICTIM: You dont seem like you wanna talk much today

GARETH: no...you always think i dont want to speak to you if im quiet, or if my phones off, Optimism, positivity (he means, believe my B.S. or else)

VICTIM: no not at all darling , i am being optimistic just sometimes you do sound a little offish i am being positive (he is being offish - he's a sociopathic predator)

VICTIM: i said last night i was feeling positive and i trust what you say im not worrying just merely wondering.

GARETH: Ok (putting her on the defensive!)

Gareth on the Victim chatting with her actual REAL LIFE friends:

GARETH: im looking for a new nickname

VICTIM: Why?

GARETH: get away from old ways (get away from all the people I have crapped on and abused)

VICTIM: yup

GARETH: stopped being found so easily (see above - looking to hide)

VICTIM: good idea

GARETH: best one i could think of is Gareth

ME: hehe its you and its your name

GARETH: heh type that in on google try find me

VICTIM: yup loads of results

GARETH: good idea but its taken alot

VICTIM: getting out of old ways is a good idea Gareth

GARETH: yep it is .......goes for both of us

VICTIM: yes it does

GARETH: i agree, so far i havent slipped back to all the chat groups im not going back to my old ways at all (sure you aren't - you're just looking for a new cover - they all do)

VICTIM: me either

GARETH : i know but you keep gong back to the old chat groups and people, you should dump it forget about it and leave it

VICTIM: im not going back to it Gareth (yeah you would probably meet someone like HIM again - predators LIVE online)

GARETH: i know your not, but you do (putting her on the defensive AND trying to continue ISOLATING her from her friends! Typical abuser ploy)

VICTIM: i havent got any of those chat things on this computer

GARETH: i know but ypou see what i mean, move on from it for good not put it on hold

VICTIM: havent put it on hold its in the bin and thats where i want it to stay

GARETH: ok good

VICTIM: i am looking forward to you coming home and for us to have that perfectness here that was present last time you were here im focusing on that its a goal i want to reach

GARETH: :)

VICTIM: but I will keep on saying sorry until im actually forgiven (she's not the one who should be asking forgiveness but abusers LOVE to put their victims in this position!)

GARETH: you are forgiven .. i was just saying you keep going back there thats something that needs to change (no because you 2 haven't talked it out and you haven't been candid with her. You just don't "GET OVER" some things - unless you're pathological and no one means anything to you.)


Like all pathological personalities, Gareth believes he knows more than anyone.

GARETH: im checking credit cards as the phone i want and the deal is a special offer and im hoping it wont end

VICTIM: itd be good if you could get it before it ends

GARETH: xxxxxxxxxxxx

GARETH: heh the funny thing was i knew more than the salesman i wass like wheres the menu then, he said there wasnt one, so i stuck my hand out and he handed it to me, went through everything found it was bottom left button heh handed it back

GARETH: hehe i sold the fone to myself (glory-hunting, aggrandizement - blatant narcissism)

GARETH: heh he also said i can walk around house while on call with bluetooth headset, the phone can be downstairs and i can be upstairs, i said not a chance bluetooth cant and isnt made to go through even a walll

VICTIM: hehe so he was trying to sell on basis of lying to someone he thought didnt know about that technology (probably just trying to do his job)

GARETH: yup

GARETH: i know theres no need to ask, but when i get this card i really dont want anything debited from it other than the phone (puts her on the defensive AGAIN)

VICTIM: your right but theres no need to ask as i dont need to use your card

GARETH: im not saying you ....no point spending on it apart from phone im saying us
in general (no you weren't - you were blame-shifting to her!)

VICTIM: so about that fone call? any chance i can have one later, sorry to push you but i like talking to you even if it is just for 5 mins

GARETH: we can have a nice long call after yes

VICTIM: i was going to ask something then thought not

GARETH: no go on

VICTIM: Hmm I don't want to be insensitive as your not feeling too good right now and I should find out on my own, I was going to ask what animation program they made XXXXX in?

GARETH: not sure

VICTIM: Everything ok?

GARETH: sorry I drifted off (because you're not important, so many other lives to screw up, people to prey on)

VICTIM: have I annoyed you? if so , sorry I shouldn't of said anything

GARETH: You haven't annoyed me, Im just thinking about tomorrow, our living together, dreading thinking whatever. (dreading having to commit to you for most than just sex)


More Gareth Putting His Victim on the Defensive & Projecting.
(He acts jealous to keep her on a string - hoping it makes him appear "caring & interested")

GARETH: you on any chat networks?, Im going to have a quick wash, go get a sandwich and drink and open more windows.

VICTIM: No im watching XXXX again im not on any chat networks dont want anything to do with them (how many times does she have to tell him that?)

GARETH: :)

GARETH: well done (yes, you have now isolated her from anyone who might show her you're a predator, a cold snake and a user)

30 mins later

VICTIM: thankyou so much for the phone call it was nice to hear your voice, If you need any support and help, i know its hard but I will help you anyway i can when you come through the door, ill make sure you get loads of hugs, and anything else you need.

GARETH: heya

GARETH: back

GARETH: I need to reboot, theres an update for a program on my computer I need to install.

NO mention whatsoever of what she said. Gareth totally ignored it. (a version of the 'silent treatment') So she made a video for him to see if she could maybe fix the situation as he'd made her feel she did something wrong (predators always make you think YOU did something wrong) -- this was maybe the 100th time she did this and he would normally treat me better after I had gone out of my way to make him happy. (if he "loved" her why would she have to jump through hoops to make him happy? Readers - ALL of our predators did this to their prey. ALL of them)

VICTIM: I have a video for you I made

VICTIM: thankyou

GARETH: grrr sexy thing (ASSUMING its a sex video - as that's all he really wants from her!)

VICTIM: your welcome

VICTIM: I have thought about something and want you to have something

GARETH: let me guess.... more asking me what train im going to get and what time. already told you I dont know yet. (why? If you love her you'd have made those plans by now...)

VICTIM: no

GARETH: sorry carry on

VICTIM: Its in the mail

GARETH: checking now

GARETH: aww thanks

GARETH: means a lot

VICTIM: when I said "patiently" i really meant that , train times are not an issue to me. you are! I hope that helps you in some way

GARETH: it does

GARETH: okies im lying down feel really tired and worn out you there? (heh - there she goes - calling him on his cold-heartedness and wanting some assurance and affection from him. Notice the HUGE emotional disconnect on Gareth's part. Sociopathic)

She heard nothing from him until the next afternoon, not sure when he was coming home, what train he was getting -- nothing. Everytime she asked him what time his train was he got angry at me. He probably did this on purpose knowing she'd get frustrated the more he held back. (Or he simply didn't care. at all. It's called WITHHOLDING and its yet another abuse tactic

VICTIM: have i blown things with you

GARETH: i dunno

VICTIM: ok i understand

GARETH: things dont always sort themselves out (...with a sociopath)

VICTIM: no they dont, but im trying to sort things out my end, to stop giving you a hard time but the thought is ....are you still going to fight for us ? as iam hon (no he's not - his ACTIONS not his words will say everything)

GARETH: yep (words... only words)

VICTIM: ok :)

GARETH: brb my sisters looking at my film list (no surprise - he runs away from TRUE EMOTIONS AGAIN!!)

ARGUMENT

I was getting tired and confused over why he said one thing yet did the opposite. (because he's a sociopath) One minute he would be be consistent, the next minute he had changed his mind. (sociopath) So I tried to break it off and end the relationship; he had kept me waiting for over 6 weeks due to promise after promise being broken. He'd dumped me so many times already as it was, I didn't see anything wrong in asking him to stick to at least 1 promise. (no but with a sociopath/ narcissist they have HUGE problems with accountability AND reality. They never stick to anything unless there's something in it FOR THEM)

GARETH: You just broke up with me, and i know you are back to your old self (Again putting HER on the defensive when he should be held ACCOUNTABLE)

VICTIM:: No im not

GARETH: the one i couldnt love, i loved the real you, youve changed back (it's HER fault? These guys can only 'love' one thing - THEMSELVES!! They are INCAPABLE of love)

GARETH: should i tell my dad to give it two weeks before bringing all my stuff down, i dont think you are the same Stacie, how do i know you wont leave me when i get there, should we give it a two week tester? (he probably didn't want to come down anyway - now, typical predator - he's making it all her fault. PROJECTION)

VICTIM: how do I know that you won't leave me, you have done it so many times (he will)

GARETH: if you were your old self, the loving one, it'd be fine (the one who swallowed all my BS, believed all my lies & didn't hold me accountable that is)

VICTIM: i am the same, i just cant keep going on the same way, i cant keep hoping, and praying and dreaming things are going to be the same way when i know they aren't , you get my hopes up then they you dash them. (sound familiar, readers? She hasn't realized yet he's a predator. A snark. A shark. He kills and leaves. No empathy, no remorse)

GARETH: your not the same to me (because she's starting to question your BS?)

VICTIM: im the same as i was before (just smarter & more aware something's wrong)

GARETH: I dearly hope you are, I trust you and will take your word for it. (no he won't - because he doesn't care)

GARETH: ive emailed you some questions, could you answer them for me by tonight or tommorow morning

VICTIM: ill go look now

GARETH: i think id like you to answer them now, and then again in the morning

GARETH: tell me when you are next to the laptop and in bed

GARETH: darling?

GARETH: tell me when youre here darl, in fact if you get into bed and turn on skype ill whack off for you, and show you anything my a** to my **** to licking my own ***, if you get into bed, and turn skype on. (all about SEX!! she's asking for some REAL answers about their relationships and his way of "CONFIRMING" his feelings is cybersex? Predator. ICK)

VICTIM: Im here, im sorry i was so selfish

GARETH: no your not

VICTIM: yes I am

GARETH: if you loved me and saw a future youd wait till wednesday and help me through it (oh god he's NAUSEATING!)

VICTIM: im so sorry, im such a selfish person, i know it, i cant apologise enough,

GARETH: two days, couldnt wait two days that says something (putting her on the defensive after all HE had put her through by then!!)

VICTIM: its been 6 weeks!

GARETH: now ive seen you like this, so nasty again (unreal aren't they? When you see it from a distance. How dare he continue his projection.)

VICTIM: Im not nasty , I did wait

GARETH: yes you are. (Gareth just 'shut up' -- how much more cruel can you be?)

VICTIM: fine ill wait

GARETH: well you made it *applause* you left the guy that wants to spend his life with you regardless of everything else (oh spare us Gareth. As if that was the truth)

VICTIM: my dad said to me tonight "if you dont make a decision, youll be left always wondering"

GARETH: heh yes now you will always be wondering.. whether i would of came back and if we would of stayed together for life...now you will wonder as you left me before i could get to yo

GARETH: im not giving in to selfish demands such as: leave tommorow (he wants her to give in to only HIS selfish demands)

VICTIM: i know that now

GARETH: well i know what would of happened and im trying to comprehend my future without you and i hate it

VICTIM: ive been selfish! but i cant keep on doing this (you aren't selfish - you're getting smart to this emotional rapist)

GARETH: but you made the choice, and you are back to your old nasty selfish attitude

VICTIM: no im not

VICTIM: Im sitting here waiting for you as always

GARETH: no you broke up with me (boo hoo... Martyr Man)

VICTIM: can you blame me? im always waiting, i cant do it anymore. im so confused I dont know what to do anymore (typical feelings with a predator - and he will find a way to blame her.)

GARETH: no you left me nothing to be confused about anymore you can go back to chatting to people in chat rooms and while away the hours (AGAIN he brings this up!)

VICTIM: Im not chatting to anyone

GARETH: yet, wait two days or bugger off back to the internet, it shows whats more important and your attitude (Projection - he's probably already chatting up other people and has been right along)

VICTIM: im not chatting to guys!!!

GARETH: yet (sadist)

VICTIM: im waiting for you

GARETH: No your not you left me (how old is this guy? 7 years old?)

VICTIM: gods sake

GARETH: not all things are reversible

VICTIM: I left you because I cant take it anymore, the mixed signals. the getting angry at me for no reason, the not speaking to me and broken promises. (victims always think they can talk sense to these guys - before they realize they're PATHOLOGICAL & SICK!)

GARETH: Exactly so theres no more waiting (NO ACCOUNTABILITY FOR WHAT SHE JUST SAID!)

VICTIM: for goodness sakes

GARETH: you wont listen, your back to your old self (heh - listen to WHAT? his selfish b.s.?)

VICTIM: no, im not, you just think i am, im upset

GARETH: no I know you XXXXX you used to be much more mature and nice wanting to talk at night on skype (and believing my lies)

VICTIM: i am mature (more than him, that's for sure)

GARETH: chuck it all away for the sake of another 2 days wait

GARETH: very mature

VICTIM: im sick of going around in circles, im sure others can tell you im not back to my old ways

GARETH: they may, but at least before you were different towards me, you understood

VICTIM: I dont want to argue you made your choice i made mine

GARETH: my choice was to spend my life with you, your choice was not to give me the chance to do that, before youd of said 2 days no problems, cant wait to cuddle and sleep with you and walk with you and bath with you , now you leave.

(She ended up apologising and asking him for another chance, and then he told her:)

GARETH: we will have to sort all this out when I get back, we are not over but a lot has to be sorted now

(Don't you want to just SMACK Gareth? His mind games are so cruel & pathetic)









COMING TO THE END OF THE RELATIONSHIP

I spent the next year in stress Gareth would spend all his time in our bedroom and when his parents or boss would call him, he would send me out of the room and talk in secret, all his emails to his family would be secret and I was never allowed to see what the conversations were about. My children were not allowed to make any noise when he was on the phone or he would ignore me for the rest of the day and just be aloof on purpose.

I started to get rashes all over my body, I couldnt understand what it was, but I was covered head to foot in it, it was sore and itched constantly for 4 months, I went to the Doctor and he said it was Hives / allergy from stress I put all this "stress" down to losing the baby. (it was GARETH - toxic GARETH)

His "Silent Treatment" would go on for hours on end,and when I would get frustrated after the 4th hour of this, or angry he would tell me I was the crazy one for yelling at him and trying to get a rise out of him.

He never ate dinner with me and the children; instead sat in the bedroom and ate his dinner when I brought the plate up to him, after dinner he would continue working or playing "rainbow Six" or "Postal" or "Working" (hmm... wasn't he accusing HER of being ONLINE all the time? He was online because it was a 2-dimensional world and "real" people are just objects to these cyberpaths. Besides - these predators feel: why invest any more in something you can't control)

Whenever we went out it was always when the children were at my mothers, he usually slept cuddling me, but started to sleep turning to the wall and didnt want me to cuddle up to him. He said "Its because i always sleep like this" which wasnt true so that was the first sign he was starting to lose interest in me. (no it was the one behavior you finally saw - Sorry but he was NEVER interested in you; just in what he could "get" out of you - sex, affection, a place to live, food, etc)

Sex wasnt a problem whenever he wanted it -- he was loving but as soon as it was over he would get back on his computer and ignore me. (because that's all he wanted)

If I said anything whatever it was didn't matter, he would tell me "That's not what you said" I spent weeks and months thinking I was losing my memory or going nuts. (Gaslighting)

I remember sitting on the bed crying once, in deep pain over the loss of our baby and he stood over me staring blankly, all i wanted him to do was cuddle me and tell me everything was going to be ok, but instead he said "Im going out as this upsets me and i cannot stand the crying and loud noise, ill come back when you have calmed down" (narcissist)

When his boss used to come over to meet with him for a meeting he would shoo me and the children out the house and tell me to make sure the house was pristine before his boss arrived, then we had to get out the house and not come back until he phoned me. (WHAT? What a sick piece of dung he is)

Gareth always criticised me over laundry, smoking (he would hide my lighters in the freezer for some reason and blow them up outside by making a fire and making me watch) To him, his home town was amazing and living with me couldn't compare to it. I grew to feel so ashamed of my house (which is rather lovely) all because he would moan about the location and didn't like any of his work collegues or family to set foot in it. (Blame shifting, degrading)

I was so emotionally numb because during all this time he had left a few times and come back again and I needed reassurance so I asked sometimes "are you going to leave me" this was usually when he was silent or in a mood about something. I was so insecure at this point. I felt nothing was going to be consistent, no one was going to stay with me. I had lost two children already I needed some reassurance and stability. (Gareth knew that, knew she was vulnerable and worked her like a puppet)

He would go silent on me whenever i asked him things that had to do with us as a couple or our relationship. He wouldnt talk and kept his eyes on the computer, I got so frustrated because he would never telll me how he felt and would always "Sigh" or exhale loudly (abuser tactic - to belittle her & her needs)

Whenever we had guests such as my parents or friends over, he would stay in his room and not come down, he wouldnt even greet anyone. My family said it was really rude, but I tried to explain to them that it was because Gareth was shy and didn't like social gatherings. (No he was RUDE and a SOCIOPATH)

Gareth told me about the Milgram Experiment once, was totally besotted with it. I found out by looking through his files on the computer that he had hundreds of books on psychology , & the art of seduction and hypnosis, I would always ask him if he used it on me he told me he would never manipulate me that way, he used it on other people. (BINGO!)

He never got angry (no he was angry ALL the time it appears). Never hit me or showed rage (just verbal & emotional abuse) He was just silent, where he wouldnt speak at all and this really angered me after a while as he just wouldnt speak. Like talking to a brick wall. He knew I used to get so very frustrated by this, sometimes id see a smirk running across his face when he knew I was pushed into a corner. (that's SEVERE abuse - the silent treatment, withhold - its BLATANT ABUSE)

One thing I always noticed was Gareth never made eye contact with me. When your asking someone a question or talking in general you will get eye contact or they will look at your face. Its a natural thing for humans to do, but with Gareth he never made eye contact with me , not ever (TYPICAL SOCIOPATH TRAIT!! BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE OBJECTS TO THEM) I used to think "Oh thats just the way he is" but now I realise it is very disturbing and unnatural. (AND PATHOLOGICAL) He would always pick a spot and stare at it when I was talking to him. (tuning you out)

Sometimes I would wake up around 3am and on opening my eyes, would see his face over mine, staring down at me. I have no idea how long he spent doing that, but I found it uncomfortable. (Sociopaths do that a lot)

We got a dog after a few months and whenever he got home from work he would bypass me and go right to the dog and kiss and cuddle it. I would always have dinner ready on time and the house clean but he'd take his dinner and the dog to the bedroom and stay there petting it and kissing it and ignoring me all evening. If I would venture upstairs to spend time with him he would sit there and baby talk the dog. if I wanted some affection it would have to be on his terms or when he was playing a video game / doing work and wanted to show me something. (ABUSE - he was taunting you with a DOG!)

When I needed money to get the children some clothes I asked him for the money but he said he needed $500 for his parachute jumping. (BAD PRIORITIES!) If it wasn't for my mother the children would of gone without clothes.

READERS - thank GOODNESS she's no longer with this "person" (if you could even call him HUMAN!) Fighter