Let me tell you about a foreign friend of mine. We'll call him "Jose" just to keep him anonymous.
Jose came to the US several years ago. Highly trained in computer networking, he stopped in on one of my dance classes to learn how to dance. At that time he was actively engaged in pursuing American women. While growing up in his home country, American women, as well as the American singles scene was so glamourized on TV and the movies that he too wanted to participate in this wonderful world. He started by going "clubbing" in Minneapolis' daycare center...err....I mean "hipster" area - Uptown. He failed miserably and thus changed tactics by taking classes from "pick up artists."
Here he had limited success. He did learn the basic rules of ignoring and being indifferent, "negging" and so forth, resulting in a fair amount of dates, but the problem was that he was at heart a traditional man. Yes he wanted to play the scene, but it was for the ultimate goal of finding a wife, settling down and having children.
Sadly the "singles scene" in Minneapolis is NOT designed to produce high quality marriage candidates.
Thus when he was stood up, 505025'd, strung along, or just plain dumped when he started asking about getting serious, he become frustrated. Realizing at the age of 35 what most American native males do around 25, that finding a quality marriable woman is laughably impossible, he sank into a deep depression as he saw his imaginary wife and little Joses fade away.
However there was an unexpected life line of hope. Jose flew to Eastern Europe to do some mountain climbing, where at a small motel he stayed there was a nice central European woman. She ran the bed and breakfast he was staying at, cooked him meals, EVEN CLEANED HIS CLOTHES, and well...you can imagine what happened from thereforth.
Now, after two years of semi-annual visits, and constant contact on the phone, Jose is on his way back to this former Soviet country to marry this girl and bring her back to the states. I was driving him to the airport and asked him, "So when she gets here, is she going to work, or are you guys going to work on a family right away?"
And he said, "Oh, no. She will not work. I will go and work and make the money. She will stay at home and keep the house in order and make meals and bring up the children. I will work all day, come home and then I will take her to the theater."
It was a beautiful statement because whereas today people have been brainwashed to believe a woman staying at home doing the "womanly duties" is nothing more than a slave to the man, the reality is that Jose really does love this girl.
And the reason why is that she is not going to be some "slave" that he comes home to and yells at, "where the hell's my dinner, woman?!" It's the beautiful division-of-labor idea that one person would work, the other would work at home, they would raise a family and then my buddy Jose would look forward to nothing more than coming home and taking his wife to the theater.
Of course, what do those stupid Latino's and dumb Eastern European morons know about love and marriage? Look at how neanderthal Jose is, let alone how naive his fiance is. Why, don't they know the pinnacle of marriage is to have TWO people working TWO, if not, THREE JOBS, while they outsource the upbringing of the children to the nanny, or pay higher taxes to the state educational system? They then rush home where no food has been prepared and the children are slowly alienated from their parents. Let's not forget that Mrs. Jones-Hyphenated-Smith needs to get her masters is child psychology so she can better understand why little Johnny set fire to the couch. And Mr. Smith better work really hard to buy all those toys his children want, not to mention baseball practice, volleyball, student council, debate and racquet ball. And he better work doubly hard to buy his wife that new SUV she NEEDS, otherwise, she may just have to file for divorce because there wasn't enough jewelry to reconcile their differences.
Obviously Jose does not know what he's doing.
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