Jesus Christ Television (by the Occult Killer)

Dubbed the Occult Killer by the media, Brandon is serving 6 to 12 years in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania Department of Corrections. His crime: he killed his best friend in a drunk-driving accident. When police investigators discovered Gothic paraphernalia in his bedroom, they naturally concluded Brandon had committed a sacrificial murder for the benefit of Satan.

Crazy news in the even crazier realm of metal, my cellie and I have discovered a 30 minute golden nugget of headbangin’ music video goodness at 1:30 AM. On what channel, you ask? Why the only appropriate place for hair-raising, blood-boiling sonic battery: JCTV. That’s Jesus Christ Television. Read that again. I know you’re confused now, but be prepared to faint. A few of these bands rock harder, faster, and with more talent than some of the stuff I listen to. I’ll wait for you to regain consciousness.

The only real difference is image and content. I don’t know what JCTV’s criteria for a Christian hardcore band is, but if it’s what I think these guys are really passionate about God. More unexpected than a drunken brawl at a church picnic, you fill in the blank. I like the “God’s Wrath/scare you straight” stuff and can embrace what’s flawed or negative about Christianity. That would explain the heaviness of this Jesus Metal wave, but much of the music isn’t about that from what I can gather. Makes me want to bitch slap some of the bands I listen to and tell them they’re being taken to school by religious light weights.

In summation, check this out if you dare: “Back Burner” by “August Burns Red”, “Consume, Devour, Repeat” by “The Famine”, and “Hey John, what’s your name again?” by “The Devil Wears Prada”. That’s more or less the cream of it. I’m touch and go with Devil Wears Prada. Talented guys, without a doubt, but only parts of their music is to my taste. I was put off by the name alone. Really? Same as the book/movie about the cutthroat world of fashion? Maybe they are insinuating that Satan is way too sexy to wear anything else. I don’t know.

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Shaun Attwood