And the reason I'm a bit upset is that for the past 19 years I have been living under a falsehood. A falsehood that has cost me greatly. A falsehood that has cost me economic utility. A falsehood that has LOWERED MY STANDARD OF LIVING FOR THE PAST 19 YEARS!
What is that falsehood, you ask?
That Flintstones vitamins cost more than regular vitamins because the makers of Flintstones vitamins know they can charge a premium for their vitamins because of the "Flintstones" branding.
So I go to Wal-Mart to restock on protein powder. Naturally I'm in the medicine/pharmacy section of Wal-Mart, and as people are wont to do they realize there are other things they need. I ran out of lycopene, I also needed more calcium pills, and then was kicking around this thing called "Liveraid" because as you know the Captain likes his Rumpie.
Sure enough, my eye looks at the Flintstones vitamins.
"Ho ho ho! Foolish advertisers. I know you're jacking up the price of those Flintstones vitamins just because it's the Flintstones."
But then I looked at the price.
For a 75 tablet bottle of Flintstones vitamins it was $5.98 at Wal-Mart.
For (my current vitamin) "Centrum Alpha Male Bad Boy Salsa Dancing Economist" (Centrum specializes their vitamins, you know) it was $9.98 for a 100 tablet bottle.
That means the Flintstones vitamins are only 7.97 per tablet,
While the "Centrum Alpha Male Bad Boy Salsa Dancing Economist" vitamins are 9.98 CENTS PER TABLET!
Why have I been not only overpaying for vitamins, but being denied the fun and pleasure of eating Flintstones vitamins!!!!
So you know what I did!
Damn right!
I bought a bottle and I ain't going back to bad boy alpha male Centrum! I'm a Flintstones Man now! I'm going to relive the 1980's and eat the Flintstones vitamins like they were candy! And, if you ever played this game with your siblings when you were younger, I'm going to re-institute the childhood game, "Who Can Eat the Most Vitamins and Have the Yellowist Pee Game" again.
I'm really enjoy the decline now baby!
No comments:
Post a Comment