So I went out dancing about a week ago. Rockability band at a DT dive called "Lee's Liquor Lounge." I opted to switch to Rockabily because of two reasons;
1. The chicks there are more prone to dance than the latin scene.
2. The chicks there are not Jesus freaks, but rather gals that pull of a delicate balance of nice, traditional girl that appreciates dancing that might be a little naughty and likes to wear leather.
My theory seemed to have some merit as upon my second foray in the Rockabily scene I met a girl who insisted on two things;
1. That she was NOT a "flight attendant" but rather a "stewardess."
2. She wanted me to call her Ginger.
How could I refuse? So we were dancing the night away, having a grand time. And knowing a thing or two about the airline industry I asked her,
"So, do you work for Northwest Airlines" the local carrier here in Minneapolis.
She said "yes I do"
And I recalled that the flight attendant's union was contemplating going on strike so I asked her, "you guys on strike yet?" To which she said, "not yet, but we might go."
By the end of the night we had danced about a solid 45 minutes, I had to get going and as I got her number and wished her farewell she gave me a rather close hug and almost kissed my ear whispering in it "I had a great time."
Now, most normal, rational, logical males at this point would assume that if the girl gave you the number and you had had such success on the dance floor that chances were pretty good you'd have a date. And whilst I am always warying of women and their ability to flake out, this one had gone off so well that I admitted, I got arrogant and cocky and actually assumed that a date was in my future.
A week or so passes by and through phone messages, she tells me that she and some of her friends are going to a venue DT Minneapolis called "The Local" and that I'm invited. Nice Irish pub, been there before, so I decide to show up.
Now there are times in my life where I wonder if I'm just bombed out of my gord and don't know it. You ever have that feeling? Like you missed something completely and the only way you can explain it is that you were on drugs or maybe you got hit on the head and lapsed out. Kind of like Edward Norton in "Fight Club" doesn't know he's Tyler Derden and living the second life? Because I could have sworn she said, "we are going to The Local." And "You are welcomed to show up." I wish I didn't delete the message so maybe I could prove to myself I'm not insane.
Regardless, I can't be too insane, because they were at the Local when I showed up, thus I was not hearing things when I heard "we are going to The Local. "
Where it gets confusing and I am righteously punished for my arrogance and stupidity in assuming I would have a date and that chicks mean what they say, is upon my arrival Ginger seemed shocked. I gave her a quite innocent and standard hug hello and after the greeting pleasantries she immediately excused herself to the bathroom for the next 20 miuntes.
In her absence I started talking to her friend. Being somewhat observant of the fact Ginger was having quite the movement, I asked her friend if I had done something wrong. "No, not that I'm aware of." And so I wrote it off at nothing. Finally, Ginger returned and then proceeded to...talk to everybody else but me. With her back to me for the majority of the time the only person I could really talk to was her friend. And while that conversation was pleasant, it unfortunately ended as a guy that had caught her attention waved to her and absconded with my only conversationalist.
So there I am, sitting at the bar with Ginger's back to me contemplating if a good stint in Iraq wouldn't be better for my mental health than the life of luxury I lead in Minneapolis. I'm looking at myself in the mirror wondering if indeed the rating of 8.6 I got on Hot or Not.com was legitimate. And with a seminar to be conducted in the early morning the next day, I opt to leave and sneak away unbeknownst to Ginger.
Now, there are several lessons to learn from this episode;
1. Ginger is a moron.
2. I am a moron for thinking things should go as they should as if it were 1947.
3. I should have drank a lot more that night
4. Union workers are idiots.
And if I had remembered lesson number 4, this whole pissing away of my time would have been avoided. And it shouldn't have been that hard to remember for unions have displayed incredibly stupidity in recent months. Particularly with bankrupt or borderline insolvent companies.
As I mentioned before, Ginger works at Northwest Airlines. Northwest Airlines has filed for bankruptcy. It can only hope to come out of bankruptcy as a mere fraction of its former greatness. And the better it can do now whilst under bankruptcy protection, will certainly help it survive in a higher-employing capacity in the future.
It seems all the unions that work for Northwest Airlines are too stupid to make the connection that their jobs will be lost unless the company survives. So what do they do???? THEY STRIKE!!!!!
First it was the airlines mechanics. Complaining about not enough pay and how Northwest Airlines wanted to outsource/sub-contract some of the repairs to subsidairies and other countries. Then you had the pilots thinking about striking about changes to their pay plan. And now you have the flight attendants.
You stupid, effing morons.
For you see, in nature there are some creatures that have a symbiotic relationship that benefits both creatures. Like whales and whatever those things are that attach themselves to whales. And while optimally, you'd think that the airline and the unions could have a similar relationship, it seems that the unions don't want a symbiotic relationship, as much as they want a parasitic relationship. And hell, you have to give more credit to a parasite in that they know they don't want to kill off the host. Such intelligence can't even be applied to NWA's bevy of unions as they're seemingly insistent on accelerating the death NWA.
Of course, I don't credit union workers with being able to think that far ahead. Ask any union worker, "well if the company liquidates its assets and goes out of business, where will you work," you'll get a blank stare. But even this line of debate is irrelevant. For what the flight attendant, mechanic and (to a lesser extent) pilot unions fail to realize is that they are effectively obsolete. Especially in an airline. Planes are notorious for flying long distances. Why pay Fatass Joe in Eagan, Minnesota to repair a plane at $35/hr when that plane can be flown to Mexico or Jakarta (that's in Indonesia for you union folk...Indonesia is a country) and have Bukbar fix it just as good for $10/hr?Flight attendants as well. Why should an airline pick up flight attendants from Grosse Pointe and pay them $20/hr when they can load up the plane with Mexican women or Chinese women for a fraction of that cost.
And (although this makes for an interested argument FOR nationalized health care) why the hell would NWA load up the plane with American flight attendants at all? American flight attendants demand health care coverage. Canadian ones don't because the Canadian government is paying for their health care, making it worth the flight to load up your attendants in Winnipeg. Of course, if unions don't understand the argument that they're killing off their host and they'll have nothing to parasite off of if the host dies, they certainly are not going to comprehend the arguments that have their basis in complex international economics and globalization.
So as a favor to all the flight attendants out there, and especially for Ginger, perhaps I could simplify the argument a bit so they can better understand the situation. This is your competition;
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