Best of Captain Capitalism - Why Low Corporate Taxes are Like Cary Grant

So there's a wave of socialism occurring in South America. Hugo Chavez has revamped the current contracts he's had with the bevy of oil companies that have invested in Venezuela so that the state gets 82.5% and ownership of the oil fields.

His Mini-Me Poodle (and waaaaay more of a poodle than Blair could even be accused of being Bush's) Evo Morales just stole the two largest gas fields from Petrobas, BP, Total and Repsol. And let's not forget their handcuffing of Suez, the French water firm that has brought water to more people in Bolivia than any government could, by denying them the ability to (GASP, HOW DARE THEY) CHARGE FOR WATER!!!! This resulted in the contract being cancelled...and poor people getting NO water.

And let's not forget my favorite, the Argentines decision in 2001 to pay back that $132 billion when they damn well feel like it, if at all. Until that time Nestor Kirchner has asked his people to boycott Shell, which is the epitome of all their problems...not stupid people who elect morons into office.

So here's what I don't get;

Why the hell is anybody going to invest in these scam countries again?

No seriously. $5 billion alone was invested in Bolivia's natural gas industry by foreign firms. They turned fields that were producing nothing, literally nothing, into fully functional gas fields. The same could be said for Hugo's beloved and sole source of power; oil. Anywhere from 1/3 to 1/2 of the oil being pumped out of Venezuela is pumped out only because foreign companies came in and did the work. And once the infrastructure is built up and everything running (not to mention billions of dollars worth of investment and therefore jobs created in these local countries), the moronic people of these nations, lacking any sense of basic economics, elect socialists and renationalize everything, essentially bitch slapping the foreign investors in the face.

Grand.

Alas, I can't see how this would be any different than beating a woman in the hopes of her becoming your wife.

Seriously.

I was under the impression that to woo a lady you (I don't know) BE NICE TO HER????

You know, things like flowers, being funny, witty, taking them out dancing, making their time spent with you enjoyable so they'd WANT TO hang out with you. They WILLINGLY invest their time in you.

The same, I'd assume would apply for companies and investors. If you want companies to invest in your country and create jobs, then maybe a good first step would be to not reneg on your contracts, let alone confiscate all their assets.

And hell, that's physical abuse. Let's talk verbal abuse. Have you ever heard a leftist here in the US say anything nice about a corporation?

Like "they bring jobs into this economy."

Or "I'm happy they make a good product at a good price."

Or "Gee, Wal-Mart has effectively raised poor people's standards of living by bringing the prices down for practically ALL goods and services, thereby boosting their purchasing power; thanks Wal-Mart."

No, it's usually this vitriolic, hate-filled, venom, spewing from their mouths;

"CORPORATIONS DON'T PAY THEIR FARE SHARE!"

"IT'S CORPORATE AMERICA THAT'S CONTROLLING THE WORLD AND MAKING US SLAVES!"

"CORPORATIONS ARE NOT SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE!"

"CORPORATIONS USE ALL THOSE LOOPHOLES!"

It is literally no different than a guy going up to his wife and saying;

"You are the dumbest, fattest slob I know!"

"Get your ass off the couch and make me dinner, woman!"

"If you don't go down to the liquor store and get me my whiskey, you'll feel the back of my hand!"

Alas, I aliken countries to varying men depending on their approach as to how they'd intend to attract investors and companies, just as these men planned on attracting women.

For example, Ireland, Slovenia and most of Central Europe for that matter would be Cary Grant.

They fully expect to woo investors with wit, charm, goods looks, and little, if any corporate taxes.


Then there's the US or any developed "1st World" nation.

A man who maybe at one time was the all-star quarter back in high school, but has since got a gut and just ASSUMES people are going to want to invest in him as he ASSUMES his wife will always stay married to him because how could she possibly do any better than his 40% corporate tax rate. Fetch me another beer, bitch!

And then you have the out right wife beaters and abusers. The Cubas, the Venezuelas, the Bolivias and North Koreas.

And how do they attract investment? By stealing it like some low-life, parasite boyfriend who steals his girlfriend's credit card to buy drugs and booze. They rule by fear and threatening the girl to stay with them or they'll get what's coming to them.

And you wonder why which countries have better economic matrimony?