because of his calm demeanor,
patience for office politics,
passion for traffic laden commutes,
capacity to endure inept leadership and management,
and tolerance for incompetence
is primarily self-employed.
The majority of his income comes from him instructing others be it dance classes, finance seminars, or writing books because, frankly, in all instances he has no boss. He gets to decide how things get done and (surprise surprise) it GETS DONE BETTER, FASTER AND CHEAPER than if he had some middle management yutz looking over his shoulder all the time.
However, whatever success the Captain has had, has been preceded by many failures. And that is the trick to success - failure.
For every successful venture I've come up with, there's been at least 3-4 ideas that just never took. It's very much like dating. In my youth I was considered a player. But for every girl that said yes, there was at least 8 that said no. Still, the frequency of my success led men in my cadre to believe I was a player, and this principle still applies to economic adventures.
So the Captain's come up with a new one. And, like all the other ventures before it, he's planning on this one failing too. But if it takes...hooooo boy! The Captain might just buy that Pontiac Solstice he's always wanted.
The idea is based on "capital flight." And essentially your beloved Captain would be a broker, brokering deals to get companies out of the US and move their headquarters to.....
Canada.
"Canada?" You ask.
"Yes, Canada." I reply.
"Why Canada?" you might ask.
Well here's why.
First, you have an increasingly hostile environment here in the US towards "big business." If you can stomach the outright lies and ignorance, listen to the Ed Schulz Show and you cannot go 15 minutes without one caller calling in and saying,
"You know, when are we going to have policies for the little man? When can your hard working Joe get a job? Where are all those jobs?"
and within 5 minutes another caller calling in and saying,
"You know, it's these damn corporations that aren't paying their fair share. We need to tax them and the rich! When are these criminals going to be forced to do their part for society?"
The entire time Ed just blatheringly agreeing with them.
But it goes beyond lefties listening to commie radio. There is a critical mass of people who are so blindingly ignorant of basic economics, they blame almost all problems on "big business" and "the rich."
Ask your average 22 year old "college graduate" the solution?
Tax the rich.
Why are we in the economic situation we're in?
Big business and George Bush.
Why are their nuclear reactor problems in Japan?
Big business cut costs just like they did in the Gulf of Mexico oil spill.
Of course the solution is to tax and regulate (and then whine when there aren't any jobs), but in the end the business climate in the US is simply hostile. Businesses should be looking to relocate.
Second, where does a business decide to relocate? Well among other things you look for a stable country, with the rule of law, relatively uncorrupt, and an educated population. Well shucks howdy, Canada not only has all those things, but they're right next door to the US. And not only are they next door, they speak English. And not only do they have these things, guess what? Despite the Magic O bringing Kumbya Nirvana to the US, it seems Canada is trouncing the US in terms of corruption. 8.9 vs 7.1 (the color is misleading as the US is at the bottom of that color spectrum while Canada is at the top).
Third, have you looked at the finances of Canada vs. the US? I'll take Mr. Harper over Mr. Obama any day.
Fourth, and here is where the ole Captain hopes to bag some great clients. Statutory corporate tax rates in the US are 40%. In Canada, they are slated to be a mere 15% come 2012. Mexico, 30%.
Now is the time you can fully expect the automotonic response from the left about "the corporations don't pay that amount. They use LOOPHOLES. Their effective corporate tax rates are MUCH lower."
Yeah, "much" lower. try 32%. And forget the whole concept a corporation wouldn't be engaging in the accounting trickery in the first place if corporate tax rates weren't 40%. And never mind if they move to Canada they would still beat the effective corporate tax rate by more than half.
But I am not here to preemptively strike leftist arguments about corporate taxes (no matter how fun and easy it is to do). I'm here to simply point out a very lucrative market.
Say I approach 3M (whose CEO has been hinting he might make a great client). Well, of course the leftists here hate big business. And since 3M doesn't pay any taxes here at all because of "loopholes" then nobody should miss them if they up and leave, right?
Well here's 3M's latest income statement;
Wow, I guess they are paying taxes after all!
Not the 40%, but just shy of 30% on average.
Now assume good ole George of 3M decides to hire the Captain. The Captain arranges for some meetings, and we get 3M to relocate to Canada.
What kind of savings did the ole Captain bring to the 3M shareholders?
Well, under the Captain's plan 3M shareholders would have to pay $863 million in taxes.
In 2010 they paid $1.6 billion.
A savings of $740 million.
The type of dollar figures I'm talking here are on par with the other brilliant idea I had about...oh.....5 years ago. Back then I had this funny idea there was a housing bubble forming. And that if the entire financial services industry just listened to me (or Shiller, or Roubini, or Schiff), I would have saved the country hundreds of billions of dollars.
But nooooo. You don't have an MBA and didn't go to Harvard like our dear leader, Obama.
Regardless and sarcasm aside, you throw in a 3M, a General Mills, a Best Buy, a Cargill and soon we're talking real money. And not only are we talking real money. We're talking huge economic ramifications for the country.
For you see, the ole Captain, along with all of his readers, can go ahead and laugh at himself knowing due to the lethargy of corporate America, such a revolutionary idea is nearly impossible. And the Captain, like when he went up and asked out Charmin Michelle not knowing who she was, is fully aware his chances are very slim. But for all of the people in the US who love to hate corporate America and blame "big business" for everything, don't worry. The Captain is working on it right now to get those evil, icky, yucky gross corporations out of here so you don't have to suffer under them any more.
No comments:
Post a Comment