JESUS WILL SAVE YOU...But Only on Tuesdays

And so it happens again.

I had a friend a while ago that was a single mother. Got pregnant when she was 16, was a party girl, didn't really take her life seriously, drank, let her folks bring up the kid, didn't study in school and then one day the parents cut the purse strings.

Faced with the harsh realities of not just self-supportation, but the supporting of a child, she managed it for about a year before she (you guessed it) "found Jesus." And I always found it interesting how people who can't deal with the harsh realities of life always become born agains and "find Jesus."

And it basically boils down to something as simple as this;

People will goof up. People will make mistakes. You can either be a man about it, admit you made those mistakes, face up to those mistakes and live with the consequences or go find some excuse as to why it isn't your fault. And the latter case is the born agains and that is why I cannot stand them.

For it is has nothing to do with the noble purposes of religion (salvation, repentance, etc.) but to shield the ego of a person who does not have the character and wherewithal to be an adult and look at themselves in the mirror and say, "I goofed up."

Now I know Christianity isn't the only religion out there where people will abuse seeking for something else to make their lives easier or explain why their lives suck. If you are a poor young Arab the local imam may trick you into believing that it's Israel and foreign powers intervening in your life, making you poor, thereby incentiving you to go and join Islam and blow yourself up. I remember a woman desperately trying to marry a Jewish man so her son could become Jewish. I even remember one particularly intellectually weak-minded person that joined Christianity because she got in trouble for stealing a pair of pants in middle school (akin what Hilton above has done). But whatever the reason, the true reason for joining the religion is avoid serious self evaluation, criticism and blame and to make your life easier by jettisoning your responsibility for your actions and your situation. It is ulterior to the true purpose of the religion and is an insult to that religion. They're hypocrites.

But Christianity is different and is why I theorize it attracts more born agains (like Paris). And the reason I say this is two fold;

1. The forgiveness aspect. Hey, you could have kills a bunch of kindergartners, punched some nuns or been Hitler and as long as you ask for forgiveness, you are forgiven.

Are you joking me? This is the big attraction to those where reality or the authorities have caught up with and are now going to suffer punishment. Living life as if they are above all others, when revenge is about to take its toll, then they start to search for an excuse for their behavior. Having none, how convenient there's a bible there. And how convenient according to this doctrine you are forgiven. It absolves a person of any personal responsibility. This still doesn't change the fact my friend's kid has grown up in poverty is not going to have a decent shot of getting out of it.

2. The "Fateism" or "Calvinistic" aspect of religion. That everything is in God's hands or fated to happen. That God has a plan and you have no ability to control or change the outcome. I don't know how many times I've seen the direct consequences of an action a Christian friend of mine has made and when I asked them, "why did that happen?" "Well, God has a plan." Yes, a plan. I'm sure this morning when I woke up, God planned me to have a Rooster Booster light. My personal tastes and preferences had nothing to do with it. I was powerless, I really wanted a diet Coke, but God forced my hand to grab the Rooster Booster. Just as I'm sure it was God's plan for Mao Zedong to wipe out 40 million Chinese. Mao was completely powerless. Hey, he didn't want to wipe out all those people, he wanted to help them. But God had a plan. And I'm sure God made my friend have unprotected sex at 15 so she had a kid and has since lived in poverty.

But think about this aspect of Christianity (or at least the Calvinism sect of it) and how it again absolves you of any personal responsibility. And how convenient it must be for people whose lives just got too difficult for them to face. "Hey, it's not your fault, God has a plan."

So here's the deal people. I'm not a particularly religious fellow, but I do respect religion. And I don't much care to see people pervert and abuse a religion for purposes it wasn't intended for. So the next time you run into trouble do us all a great big favor, don't become an intellectual weakling and say "you found Jesus." That doesn't excuse your behavior or any of the bad things you've done to society. All it's done is convince you in your own little mind that you're still an OK person. Be an adult, be a responsible person, pay your dues and face the music. You'll get more respect from society and probably true forgiveness.