Sunday, September 11, 2005

Right is Way Better Looking Than the Left

Truth. Lefter leaning sorts are less attractive than those of us of righter - leaning faiths.

And don't argue with me on this. They are. I've been watching, looking, and running an informal toll in my brain looking at those on the Right versus those on the left and I'm sorry, I'd rather court the fair lasses on the Right.

It orginally started when I saw the Wellstone Memorial on TV and the eclectic mix of college students, environmentalists socialists, etc., make complete asses of themselves and tip the senatorial battle to Norm Coleman. Within 48 hours I was at the Republican victory party at the Radisson in suburban Minnesota looking at a bevy of hot and fine ladies. And the looks battle could not have been more lopsided.

Ever since then I've been driving on the interstate, looking at people with Bush bumper stickers, versus Kerry bumper stickers. Bush yard signs versus Kerry yard signs. Support our troops decals, versus "Bush Lied, How Many Died" signs. Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin versus...well...anybody.

And again, I say this not to be inciteful, but because it's true, I really think people on the Right are better looking folk than those on the left.

Now this could be for any number of reasons, but without pondering it much I have a sort of half-ass theory; Darwinism. Specifically, survival of the fittest.

You see, democrats do not like competition. They like fairness and a level playing field. Heck, they don't even like to play, they just like ties and we all go home winners. Republicans know better. Republicans know that competition and survival of the fittest is what governs the world. It's not how we'd like it, that's just how it is.

Don't believe me? Well no doubt you're a union member seeing your job being obsoleted by foreign competition and want the government to come in an protect your job (yet your loyalty to diversity and the global community runs contradictory to this...oh you poor confused leftists).

Anyway, in the competition for mating, you try to go home with the penguin with the poofiest chest. The cardinal with the brightest red. Of the man with the biggest....car. Either way, democrats fair badly in these categories on both sexes. The men are usually wimpy, skinny emasculated men who are in touch with their feelings and couldn't protect their family from an assailant if they wanted to. The women are (frankly) fat and not attractive and thus can only attract the bottom bracket of men.

There is also the element of income. Women are more attacted to men with larger....incomes. Why settle for the wiener who is a professional peace activist, living at home with his parents, when you can have the MBA graduate with a $70,000 a year job lined up. And as you make more money, people have a tendency to vote Republican more often because of the ass-raping they receive in the upper income brackets. Thus, the more attractive women can get a higher income, and thereby, more likely to be Republican guy.

The end result; the ideologies attractive different people based on how prone they are to engage in competition. And ugly people don't like engaging in competition, be it for mates or jobs in the shunned private sector. Alas, why you have not only ugly liberals, but the majority of liberals employed in sectors of the economy that require no competition; non-profit, government, charities, academia.

Either way, more proof for my theory came in the mail yesterday when the Minneapolis democrats sent in the mail their list of preferred candidates. I don't have a scanner, but I went online and put together a mural of their "beauty" queens and kings. Sure, there's a couple good looking people in there, but most are ugly.

I shall point out a couple other things, for they seem to be consistentcies across the left;

The women wear those glasses that just scream "LIBERAL." I don't know if it's the glasses or that they're all fat and the cheecks combined with glasses give it the liberal effect.

The men look gay. I mean this not as an affront to gay people. I like gays. I'm for gay marriage. It's just usually they men aren't gay, they're just feminine.

Every guy in this picture I could take in a fight in their prime, except for the old guy. He seems to be an old-school democrat who might have played some football and worked in the private sector.

Not one girl in this picture would I sleep with, even in their prime, and even if I was paid a tidy sum.

Anyway, yes, blanketing statements across the board. But I'll see if I can scrounge up the Republican ones and do a comparison.

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